The Prince, the Jester, and the Seven Oddballs
by pingo1387
Summary: AU. When Luffy's life falls under threat, he must flee the castle and seek safety elsewhere, all while dealing with romantic feelings for a peasant with green hair. Based on "Snow White." ZoLu.
1. Fated Meeting

Long ago, in a kingdom which no longer exists, there ruled a cruel queen by the name of Nami. Her subjects feared her, for she was a powerful sorceress. Should they attempt a revolt, they would be transformed into animals, have their limbs taken away, or—if the queen was in a particularly awful mood—brought to execution on the castle grounds.

In addition, Queen Nami was very vain and often spent hours simply gazing upon her visage in mirrors. Despite her disposition towards tyranny, she was indeed very cute and beautiful. Her hair was orange and long, though she usually wore it in a bun or braid; her eyes were like fine copper; her lips were full; and her skin was pale and smooth. For a year, or perhaps two, she'd had a magic mirror through circumstances which eventually shall be explained. Every day she would approach the mirror, perhaps even twice or thrice, and ask the same thing:

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the cutest of them all?"

And the mirror would respond:

"The cutest in the land is you, for speaking truth is all I can do."

Due to past events, she was also stepmother to a boy named Luffy, the prince. Although she was his legal guardian, he had been raised by the castle servants for the most part, with a few set rules from the queen, such as don't make messes, don't be loud, and don't leave the castle grounds. He had later become good friends with the court jester, who was a few years older than him, but at this time the jester had been missing for a year, or perhaps two. Insistent questioning on his whereabouts had only led to a slap on the face and no dinner for two days.

As Prince Luffy grew, his looks became cuter and cuter until they rivaled the queen's. She did not notice for many years, for she only paid attention to her own face. His skin was tan, unlike the queen's; his eyes were darker as well, like chocolate; his hair was black like his father's had been, and in a constant state of messiness, much to his stepmother's chagrin; and his smile was like a thousand suns.

One stormy evening, a knock on the castle doors brought Queen Nami to the entrance hall. Outside she found a peasant man wearing a cloak, dripping with rainwater, and shivering in the cold.

"Begging your pardon, meine Königin," he said through chattering teeth. "I'm seeking shelter from the rain. Would you permit me to stay for the night?"

"Absolutely not," Nami said frostily as she disdainfully eyed his shabby clothing.

"Please," the peasant begged, bowing low. "I will stay in the worst room with the most tattered blankets if I must, as long as there is a roof over my head."

Nami opened her mouth to refuse him again when from behind her came a voice.

"Let him in!"

She turned and the peasant looked up. Luffy stood there with his hands in his pockets.

"It's just one night, right?" Luffy asked, frowning at Nami. "If he can't afford a home of his own, this is the very least we can do."

"A proper ruler," Nami said with dignity, "does not simply allow whomever they please into the castle. They must be of good standing and—"

"That doesn't sound like a proper ruler at all, if you ask me," Luffy remarked. "Shouldn't we help our subjects whenever we can?"

Nami was struck speechless with indignance and Luffy took the opportunity to smile at the peasant. "Come in, Herr Pennbruder. You may stay in my room."

"Thank you, mein Prinz," the peasant said gratefully, and followed Luffy into the castle, leaving a fuming Nami behind. Luffy was sure to receive a punishment for this later.

"Would you like to bathe before bed?" Luffy asked, remembering his manners.

"I wouldn't want to impose," the peasant protested.

"Well, you smell terrible. Go take a bath anyway."

The man couldn't help but smile at this. "Thank you, mein Prinz."

"And drop that title, just call me Luffy," Luffy added cheerfully.

He led the peasant to the bathroom. "I'll leave a nightgown and drawers outside," he offered. "My room is the last door on the left side."

The peasant gave him a grateful bow. Luffy offered a smile in return and went off to his room.

* * *

Luffy was starting to get worried when there was finally a knock at his door and the peasant entered, wearing the clothes he'd been given. On one arm he held his folded cloak and undergarments.

"There you are," Luffy said in relief.

"I . . . may have entered the wrong door . . . two or three times," the peasant admitted, shutting the door. Luffy turned on the lamp and was delighted to finally see the face of his guest without the shadows of the cloak. It was now clear that his skin was tan with obvious muscles, his face had a slightly squared jaw, his eyes were narrow and dark gray like granite, and—perhaps most surprising of all—his hair looked like grass after the last winter snow melted.

"I love your hair," Luffy exclaimed happily. "It's such a wonderful shade of green!"

"I—thank you," the peasant said, startled, for no one had complimented his hair before.

"May I touch it?" Luffy jumped off his bed and went for the man expectantly.

"If . . . if you like."

Luffy proceeded to rub his hands all over the man's scalp. "It's so soft," he said in wonder.

Likewise, the peasant was struck by Luffy's bright smile. It was like the lamp wasn't even necessary.

"What's your name?" Luffy asked cheerfully, removing his hands and leaving a very red face behind.

"Zoro Roronoa."

"Herr Zoro, then," Luffy said decidedly.

"Just Zoro is fine."

"Zoro it is!"

There came another knock at the door.

"Come in," Luffy said, and the door swung open to reveal a blond man. His hair was swept in front of his left eye, which must have been blue like his right. Oddly enough, his visible eyebrow curled into a spiral upwards on the outside. He held a lamp in one hand as he stood in the doorway.

"'Lo, Sanji!" Luffy exclaimed.

"Prinz Luffy," he greeted with a smile. He turned to Zoro with a frown, eyeing his hair disdainfully. "And you are?"

"Zoro Roronoa," Zoro replied.

Sanji grunted in response and turned back to Luffy. "Mein Prinz, Königin Nami has asked me to inform you that you will go without dinner tomorrow night for letting 'the peasant' stay in the castle."

"What?! Not again," Luffy groaned.

Sanji sighed. "You know I would not disobey her. On a completely unrelated topic, I'm going to leave a plate of leftovers out back after dinner. It's meant to feed the wild animals, but . . . well, it's hardly my fault if someone happened upon it and took the food for themselves, right?"

Luffy grinned. "Sanji, you're the best."

Sanji grinned in response.

"Oh, by the by—would you have these washed?" Luffy grabbed Zoro's dirty clothes and held them out.

"Of course, mein Prinz," Sanji replied, taking the bundle with a faintly disgusted expression. "Good night, and sleep well." He glanced at Zoro again with narrowed eyes before stepping out.

"That was . . . ?"

"Sanji," Luffy said cheerfully. "He's really nice. He loves stepmother for whatever reason, so he always listens to her, but he hardly ever lets me go hungry, even if she tells him not to feed me for a night or two."

He looked at Zoro in wonder. "You must be awfully brave to ask shelter from her. Isn't everyone afraid of her?"

"I was desperate," Zoro admitted. "I hadn't had a roof over my head for many days."

"That sounds terrible," Luffy said, and quite unexpectedly he hugged Zoro around the middle. "We should get to sleep. Stepmother gets mad at me if I'm awake for too long."

"Right," Zoro said, a bit embarrassed. Unsure of what to do, he considered hugging Luffy back, but then Luffy released him and hopped backwards onto the bed.

Zoro began to lay on the floor, but Luffy leaned over and said, "What are you doing?"

"Wasn't I meant to sleep here?" Zoro asked in confusion.

Luffy frowned in surprise. "I won't let you sleep on the floor!"

"But there is only one bed, where shall I—?"

"Get up here. It's big enough." Luffy rolled over and waited.

Zoro slowly straightened up and climbed onto the bed, feeling rather awkward. "Are you sure, mei—Luffy?"

Luffy grinned. "Yeah, it's fine."

Zoro got under the covers and laid his head on the soft pillow. He felt warmer and safer than he had in a long while.

He was just becoming drowsy when Luffy said suddenly, "Stepmother once told me that only people married to each other share a bed."

Zoro's eyes flew open and he stared at Luffy in embarrassment.

"Why did you feel the need to bring that up?" he muttered.

Luffy shrugged. "I don't know. It just popped into my head. Anyway, good night, Zoro."

And he was asleep within minutes. Zoro stared at him in disbelief and stared at the ceiling again. Soon, he too entered the land of nod and enjoyed the most peaceful sleep he'd had in many moons.

* * *

When dawn broke, Luffy and Zoro were awoken suddenly by a fierce knocking.

"Come in," Luffy said sleepily.

Nami opened the door and her eyes fell upon Zoro, sitting up in the bed. Her eyes flashed.

"What is going on here?" she asked sweetly.

Zoro glanced between the queen and the prince nervously, realizing immediately what the situation looked like.

"I didn't want Zoro to sleep on the floor, so I let him sleep in my bed," Luffy said, looking at Nami defiantly. "I know we're not married, but sleeping next to each other for one night shouldn't be a problem, right?"

Nami sighed. "Of course, you are too foolish to even think of _that_ ," she muttered. She glared at Zoro. "Herr Zoro, was it?"

"Yes, meine Königin," Zoro murmured, not wishing to upset her.

"Get back into your own clothes and leave. I expect you out of this castle within the hour."

He nodded respectfully and she left with a swoosh of her dress.

"I don't want you to leave," Luffy admitted as Zoro got out of the bed.

Zoro chuckled. "That's very kind of you, but Königin Nami is known for her cruelty. A terrible fate may await me if I don't leave soon."

"I'll go get your clothes," Luffy offered, climbing out of bed. "They should be clean by now."

Before Zoro could even thank him, he was out the door.

* * *

"Here—"

As Zoro was leaving, he turned and was startled to see Luffy shoving a small bag into his hands.

"Food for your travels," he explained. "I convinced Sanji to give up some leftovers."

"Thank you," Zoro said in surprise.

Luffy hugged him again. This time, he whispered into Zoro's ear, "Come back tomorrow. I'll meet you on the lawn behind the castle."

"Okay," Zoro whispered back.

Luffy pulled back and grinned. "Goodbye," he said cheerfully.

Zoro waved, smiled back, and was on his way—for the time being.

From her window, the queen watched them disdainfully.

"Disgraceful."

* * *

 **Come back Thursday for a new chapter!**


	2. Head for the Hills

Zoro was a man of his word: He entered the castle's back lawn that afternoon and found Luffy sitting on cobblestone steps, drumming his feet on the ground. The prince looked over and his face lit up; he stood and hurried over to greet Zoro.

"You came!" he said happily.

"Of course," Zoro said. Luffy's outfit was different from yesterday's, but Zoro's clothes were the same.

"Did you want me for something, Luffy?" Zoro asked after Luffy only continued to grin.

"Oh, I wanted to spend time with you," Luffy explained cheerfully, and Zoro felt a little jolt somewhere in his chest.

"I—I see," Zoro said. "Then . . ."

"Come, let's sit here," Luffy said, and he plopped down onto the grass.

"Won't those clothes get dirty?" Zoro asked as he sat down.

Luffy shrugged. "I don't mind if they do, and I don't really care if stepmother does. Oh! By the way—I brought food!"

He reached into his pockets and pulled out an alarming amount of food. It seemed nigh impossible for so much to fit in those pockets. At the time, however, Zoro wasn't concerned with the physics of the matter, and more with how hungry he suddenly was.

"Eat up, I bet you're hungry," Luffy said, taking a roll for himself, and Zoro gladly accepted the offer, taking a potato and biting into it ravenously, never mind the lack of seasoning.

"Have some?" Luffy asked, offering a warm bottle of Dunkel. Zoro took this gratefully, opened it up, and took a gulp.

"I can't thank you enough," he admitted, lowering the bottle as Luffy opened a small bottle of Korn for himself (where he had obtained it within the castle was unknown). "It's not always easy to find food when travelling."

"Why are you travelling?" Luffy asked curiously. He took a sip from his liquor. "Do you have a destination?"

"No," Zoro admitted. "But I have no home, and I hope to find a place to call my own one day."

"Oh," Luffy said in surprise. He frowned. "I'd love to have you live in the castle with me, but stepmother would never allow it. We're lucky she rarely looks to the back of the castle as it is, or we would both be in enormous trouble."

This time Zoro almost choked on his beer. "You would—allow me to live with y—er, in the royal castle?"

"Of course!" Luffy exclaimed. "I like you, and besides, I don't think anyone who wants a home should be without one!"

Zoro stared at him, speechless. "That's very kind of you," he said at last. He quickly grabbed a roll and took a bite to cover up his sudden loss for words.

"If I were König, I would allow anyone without a home, any travellers to stay in the castle until they have a place to call their own," Luffy said, staring into the trees. "I almost look forward to it, despite the responsibility . . ."

"May I ask why you aren't the ruler now?" Zoro said curiously. He took another gulp from his beer. "I don't recall how the hierarchy works."

Luffy sighed. "In order to take the throne, I must be of age and be led to the altar. I'm of age, but I have yet to wed."

"Forgive me, but . . . wouldn't anyone do?"

"Technically, yes," Luffy admitted. "But I want to marry for love, not _just_ to ascend the throne. I want to find the right person . . . but it's difficult when I'm not allowed outside the grounds."

He glanced at Zoro, who was already watching him with an odd look in his eyes, and for a minute they stayed that way, just watching each other.

In the same instant they realized they were staring at one another and quickly looked away. Luffy thought he felt something in his chest, though he thought he may have imagined it; he didn't know that Zoro felt the same thing.

"So, er," Zoro said quickly, seizing his roll and taking another huge bite. He coughed, swallowed, and said, "What is it like, living with Königin Nami?"

Luffy frowned. "She punishes me a lot," he muttered, taking a potato. "But other than that, we never talk, so it's not that bad."

"I've heard she's very vain," Zoro remarked.

"Oh, she is," Luffy said vehemently. "Every day she insists on reassurance of how cute she is. I suppose she _is_ beautiful, but she would be more so if she were a bit more humble."

"You're far cuter than she," Zoro said, and immediately regretted it when Luffy looked at him in surprise.

"Cute?" he said, his mouth and eyes round.

"Forgive me, I must have spoken out of turn," Zoro said, looking away quickly.

". . . Not at all," Luffy said at last, and Zoro glanced back to see him grinning shyly. "You think I'm cute . . ."

Zoro hurriedly grabbed his beer again and took several large gulps. This time he choked and spent several seconds coughing.

"Are you alright, Zoro?" Luffy asked in alarm.

"Fine," Zoro croaked. He finally recovered and straightened, his cheeks red from coughing and perhaps something else.

"Your hair is amazing and you're an impressive drinker," Luffy said suddenly, and Zoro almost choked again, this time on nothing.

"Pardon?"

Luffy shrugged. "You complimented me, and I wanted to compliment you in return. The first thing that came to mind was your hair, but I said that yesterday, so I added onto it."

Zoro couldn't help but smile. "You're very kind."

"Oh, we're still going at it?" Luffy demanded. "Your eyes are amazing, they look so serious, like stone!"

"This—when did this turn into a competition?!" Zoro exclaimed. "You don't have to compliment me!"

"But I _want_ to!"

Zoro's chest gave that little jolt again. Perhaps he was getting sick, he mused.

In any case, they spent their time talking and drinking and eating until all refreshments had vanished, and even then they continued talking.

When the sky began to turn orange, Luffy jumped up. "Oh, no," he said, flustered. "Zoro, I'm sorry, but you'll have to go—I must be inside for dinner, and if stepmother or one of the servants catches you—"

"I understand," Zoro said quickly. He stood. "May I return tomorrow?"

He promptly turned away. "Damn it," he muttered in embarrassment. "I'm sorry, that just slipped out—"

"Of course," Luffy said in surprise. "I was going to invite you anyway."

Zoro turned back and smiled. "Thank you, Luffy."

Luffy grinned as he felt that odd jolt in his chest. It was probably nothing, he thought dismissively, and he said, "I'll see you tomorrow. Same time."

"Right," Zoro murmured. "I'll be on my way."

Luffy suddenly hugged him, and Zoro awkwardly hugged him back with little hesitation this time.

"Stay safe," he said cheerfully, stepping back. "Goodbye!"

"Goodbye," Zoro said, and he was on his way.

Luffy watched him go before heading in for supper.

* * *

The prince and the pauper continued this routine for days, even weeks. Occasionally Luffy could not go out due to some punishment, and occasionally Zoro would get himself lost and miss the meeting altogether (with fierce apologies the next day), but they met whenever they could.

Over time, the funny jolting in Zoro's chest had grown into a different kind of feeling. It was no less pleasant or unpleasant than before, but more _full_ , like his heart was swelling whenever he talked with, or was smiled at by, or was just being with Luffy.

One day while walking and lost in his thoughts (and just lost), he was struck with the realization of what that feeling probably—no, _must_ be.

"Oh, no," he groaned, leaning against a tree.

But the more he thought about it, the more it made sense: He was in love with Luffy.

"Damn it, I can't be in love with him," he muttered, sliding down the trunk to sit on the ground. "He's the Prinz, for god's sake . . . I'm just a peasant . . ."

The thoughts battled in his mind: Reasons why this could never be with simultaneous reasons why he loved Luffy rising to the surface. Luffy's kindness, his smile, his aura of sunshine, his—

"Stop!" Zoro yelled aloud, and a few birds fluttered out of the brush.

The feeling in his chest turned unpleasantly heavy as he muttered, "I can't tell him. I . . . I couldn't ever tell him."

But nonetheless, he'd once again promised to meet Luffy on the lawn that day, and so with regret he stood and was on his way in what he presumed was the right direction.

* * *

Luffy sat on the lawn, staring at the sky in thought. It was beginning to cloud over.

He glanced at the grass. It reminded him of Zoro's beautiful hair, and he felt that feeling in his chest again. The jolts had grown into a full, swelling feeling in his chest and heart whenever the peasant came to mind, or whenever they were within each other's presence.

"I can't be sick," he mused aloud, staring back up at the sky. "Seems familiar . . . what did Sanji say?"

" _Your heart feels warm and full, and you just want to be with them all the time—"_

"Right, that's what I'm feeling," Luffy said in agreement with what he remembered. "But what was that in reference to . . . ?"

" _And that's what love is like."_

Luffy sat up.

"Love . . ."

He grinned.

"So this is what it's like?"

The words _love_ and _Zoro_ slowly became almost the same thing, and the things he liked— _loved_ about Zoro came to mind: His green hair, his stone serious eyes, his hesitant smile, his friendliness, his—

"I'll tell him today," Luffy said aloud. But then his grin faded.

"Surely he . . . wouldn't mind?" he mumbled. "What if he . . . doesn't . . ."

He trailed off and shook his head. "No matter! I'll tell him today and face whatever consequences may come!"

He jumped to his feet, spun in a circle, and promptly fell back down again, giggling.

"I love Zoro," he said aloud, and the phrase was, to him, the best he'd ever uttered.

* * *

Queen Nami entered her chamber and approached the mirror as she did every day.

Smiling, she said, "Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the cutest of them all?"

There was a moment of silence. Then, as the face in the mirror grinned in delight, the reply came:

"If you think you're the cutest, you must be goofy; for the cutest is none other than our Prinz Luffy!"

Nami froze and glared at the mirror.

"I must have misheard you," she said sweetly. "Let's try that again. Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the cutest of them all?"

"I said it once, and I'll say it again," the mirror said in a gloating way, "The cutest is Luffy, no need to explain!"

Nami's eye twitched. She flew to the window and saw Luffy lying happily in the grass.

She turned her back to the window, her face distorted with rage.

"He cannot be cuter than me, he _cannot_ ," she hissed, pacing about. "No one is cuter than I, it isn't right!"

A moment more of pacing suddenly brought her to a screeching halt. She smiled deviously.

"Corpses," she murmured, "cannot possibly be cuter than me."

"Nami, you can't be serious," the mirror said nervously, all gloating gone. "I hope my hearing is delirious . . ."

Nami glared with such force at the mirror that the face actually shrunk a tad. She stormed towards it and hissed, "You are to address me as 'Meine Königin,' you wretch! I will not have—such—insubordination!"

And with that she tore the mirror clean off the wall and threw it to the ground, where it shattered into a thousand pieces.

Her eyes widened with the realization of what she'd done, but it was too late: The fragments dissolved into a smoke-like substance, which coalesced into a small tower nearly as tall as Nami herself, and which gradually became more human-like in shape and solid in texture.

Finally, a man was left standing where the fragments of the mirror had once lain. His skin was dark and his nose was long. His hair was black, curly, and it puffed out from underneath his hat, which was part of his colorful jester's outfit.

The man blinked in surprise, looked down at himself, and laughed in delight, clapping his hands and clicking his heels.

"I'm free, I'm free! I'm free at last!" he cried happily.

He glanced up and his eyes widened. The queen wore a look of rage.

"And I think I should run very fast," he finished, and promptly bolted from the room like a rabbit.

The man ran down the halls, yelling, "Prinz Luffy, where are you?! You must flee at once, and I should, too!"

Sanji almost ran into him, but hastily moved aside just in time.

"SANJI!"

He hurried to Nami's chamber and found her standing in the middle of the room, her fists clenched.

"Meine Königin," he said nervously, dropping to one knee. "Er . . . pardon me, but was that Usopp I saw?"

"Never mind that," Nami said. "I have a job for you, Sanji."

"Anything," Sanji said immediately, happy at the thought of serving her.

"I do not wish to dirty my own hands with this task," she said. "I need you to kill Luffy."

Sanji froze. "Meine Königin?"

"Did you mishear me?" Nami said coldly. "He may escape into the woods soon. You'd best hurry."

"I—"

"Go."

* * *

Usopp burst out onto the back lawn, spotted Luffy, and ran towards him.

Luffy sat up and glanced around. He spotted Usopp and his eyes widened in delight.

"Usopp!" he exclaimed happily. He leapt up and hugged him. "Usopp, where did you go all that time?! I've missed you!"

"I've missed you, too," Usopp said, giving Luffy a quick squeeze and then pushing him away. "But there's no time for all this to-do!"

"Huh?" Luffy said curiously.

"Königin Nami plans to murder you! We must make haste!" Usopp explained hurriedly, "Let us flee, mein Prinz, there's no time to waste!"

"Stepmother?" Luffy exclaimed. "But . . . _murder_ me? Are you serious?"

"I'm quite serious, do not take me for silly," Usopp said hurriedly, his jester's hat flapping. "We must go now, mein Prinz, really!"

Luffy frowned, but decided to save his question about Usopp's speech pattern for later. "Okay then, let's go!" he exclaimed. He grabbed Usopp's wrist and they ran for the woods.

* * *

 **Aye, next week (and for a while, if not for the rest of the story) we'll be updating Wednesday**


	3. Escape and Punishment

"This is far enough for now, I believe," Usopp said breathlessly, and he and Luffy came to a halt. "Luffy, if you have questions, you should ask them before we leave."

"Of course I have questions!" Luffy exclaimed. "Where were you all that time? Why does stepmother want to murder me? And why are you rhyming?!"

The answers tumbled out of Usopp's mouth.

"Two years ago, your stepmother cursed me, and I became a mirror, you see; A magic mirror incapable of lying, one who could only speak in truth and rhyming. Every day she would ask who the cutest was, and I was compelled to say 'you' without pause; But today, when she asked, to her great surprise, the answer was _you_ , Luffy, though she insisted on reprise. She became angry and threw me to the floor, and lo and behold, I was human once more; I darted out the door after hearing her plan, and here we are now, from the castle we ran. The curse of mirror has shattered, and yet, the spells of truth and rhyme are here to stay, I'll bet."

Luffy stared at him.

"Wow," he said at last. "She . . . wants to murder me . . . because I'm _cuter_ than her?"

"I speak only the truth, thanks to the spell," Usopp said promptly. "And I must answer questions, like a dog to a bell."

"Oh, I understand," Luffy said quickly. "I'll try not to ask you anything—you don't have to speak if you don't want to."

Usopp nodded gratefully.

"So we must flee," Luffy mused aloud. He frowned and was about to speak again when the pair heard footsteps behind them.

They whipped around and saw Sanji. He stopped in front of them.

"Prinz Luffy," he said in flat greeting. Usopp ducked behind Luffy.

"Oh, Sanji!" Luffy said in obvious relief with a smile. "Sorry to ask, but you can keep us safe, can't you? It sounds crazy, but it seems stepmother wants me dead. Do you know of anyplace we could hide?"

He frowned when Sanji didn't respond. In fact, the servant looked as though he might be sick.

"Sanji?" he said curiously.

Usopp's eyes widened and he nudged Luffy frantically. Luffy frowned, followed Usopp's gaze, and spotted the cause of his distress: A hunting knife was strapped to Sanji's hip.

"Sanji?" he said slowly. "What's that for?"

"Mein Prinz, please hold still," Sanji said quietly as he drew out the knife.

"Wait," Luffy said nervously, his eyes wide as he took a step back. Usopp gulped and bravely stepped in front of Luffy, shielding him.

"Usopp, move," Sanji said, clutching the handle with both hands and holding the blade sideways. "Prinz Luffy, I've been ordered to kill you."

"What . . ." Luffy whispered. "Sanji, no, don't!" He frowned at Usopp. "Usopp, I appreciate the gesture, but _get out of the way_! I won't have anyone dying for my sake!"

He gently shoved Usopp aside and faced Sanji head-on.

"Sanji, don't do it," he said. He looked to be on the verge of tears. "You've always been so kind to me! You gave me dinner when I was being punished, you played games with me when I was bored . . . and now you're going to _kill me_?"

"It is Königin Nami's orders," Sanji said as he raised the knife. He began to drive it towards Luffy's throat—

But then he saw Luffy's face and hesitated. He slowly lowered the knife.

"I have to kill you," he said again. "I shan't disobey her—!"

Luffy took the opportunity to punch him square in the face, knocking him backwards. The knife fell out of Sanji's hands as he fell hard onto the forest floor.

"Forgive me, Sanji!" he exclaimed. He whipped around and grabbed Usopp's hand. "Usopp, let's go!"

Usopp cast a nervous glance back at Sanji as he and Luffy ran through the thick trees.

* * *

They ran until the castle was no longer in sight. Finally they slowed down and sat against trees.

Usopp looked at Luffy and was surprised to find him crying.

"Mein Prinz, do you want to talk?" he asked quietly. "We have time before we must walk."

Luffy sniffled. "Today became awful so quickly. I never thought st-stepmother would—have me _killed_. And I never would have thought Sanji capable of such a thing . . ."

He hiccuped. Usopp patted his shoulder awkwardly.

"Not to mention," he continued, "I wanted to tell Zoro how I felt today, but now I cannot return to the castle, and I don't know where he is."

"Who is this Zoro you mention?" Usopp asked in surprise. "Of this name, I have no comprehension."

"He is a beggar I allowed to stay in the castle one stormy night," Luffy explained, smiling a little through his hiccups. "I've been meeting with him secretly behind the castle for a long time since, and . . . earlier today, I realized I love him."

"You're in love with a peasant?" Usopp exclaimed. "That's surprising, but not unpleasant . . ."

Luffy's smile faded again. "But now," he continued, "I have no way of contacting him . . . I may never get to tell him how I feel."

He put his head on his knees and continued to cry. Usopp, remembering a time when Luffy had cried before, began to rub his back in a comforting way. Soon the sobs died down and Luffy lifted his head, scrubbing at his face fiercely with one arm.

"Thanks," he murmured. "Sorry to hold us up like this."

Usopp shook his head. "Do not worry yourself, just put it on the shelf."

Luffy smiled. "I'll try. Let's keep going. We need somewhere to stay."

* * *

"So, he is dead."

Sanji continued to kneel with his head bowed low. "Yes, meine Königin."

He did not look up when he heard her footsteps slowly approach him.

"Raise your head," she ordered, and he slowly lifted his head. As always, he felt a pang of longing love when he gazed upon her beautiful face.

"Sanji, show me your knife," she ordered.

Sanji hesitated.

"Your knife, Sanji, did you not understand?"

He slowly drew it out and displayed it like a sword, his hands palm-up and the knife resting on them. Nami took it from him and examined it with a blank expression.

"You must be very careful," she said sweetly, "to have cleaned this blade so thoroughly."

He stiffened and looked down. "Yes."

She held the blade over the floor and pressed her fingers to it. A moment later there was a hissing noise as the metal melted, dripping to the ground, rendering the knife useless for its intended purpose. She tossed the handle aside.

"Where is the body?"

Sanji did not look up. "I buried . . . it . . . in the forest," he said quietly.

"Really," she said. "Sanji, stand up."

Sanji slowly straightened up.

"Follow me," she ordered, and Sanji anxiously followed her out of the castle, through the grounds, all the way to the woods.

She led them quite a ways before she stopped.

"Tell me what really happened," she ordered. "The truth this time, if you please."

"I . . ." Sanji licked his lips, his hands wringing together behind his back. "I've already told you, meine Königin."

She glared at him. "The _truth_ ," she commanded, and this time she flicked her fingers at his chest. Something like a spark of electricity struck him and the words spilled out of his mouth against his will.

"I attempted to kill Prinz Luffy," he said in a monotone. "I faltered and he struck my face. When I rose, he and Usopp had fled into the forest."

He gasped and regained control of his mouth, biting his lip nervously.

"And you don't know where they went?" Nami asked, flicking her fingers at his chest again.

"I do not," he replied in a monotone again. This time he clapped his hands over his mouth.

"Very good, Sanji," she murmured. "You see, it's not so hard to tell the truth."

He slowly lowered his hands. "Meine Königin—"

"Sanji, you have been faithful to me for many years," she interrupted. "For a lesser servant, I may have had them executed on the spot for such betrayal."

Sanji gulped.

"But for you . . . no, I will not kill you," she said. "I have a different . . . _punishment_ . . . in mind."

Before Sanji realized what she was doing, she had drifted up to him and stood far too close in front of him. His breath hitched in his throat.

She brought her hands up to his face almost lovingly and goosebumps erupted on his skin.

"Meine . . . Königin . . . ?" he asked breathlessly.

"First," she whispered, holding his throat as if to strangle him, but her grip was barely there, "your voice."

Sanji tried to speak, but his eyes widened when he found he could not. He looked at Nami frantically.

"Next," she continued as she slid her hands upwards. Her right brushed away Sanji's hair and he closed his eyes, but she pressed her fingers gently on his eyelids. "Your eyes."

She removed her fingers and he blinked his eyes open, but he was met with only darkness. No matter how hard he blinked and squinted, he saw nothing but void.

"And finally," she said, moving her hands to caress his ears, "your hearing."

This time the forest sounds, Nami's voice, _everything_ faded away, and Sanji was left in a dark, silent world, with the feeling of his heartbeat in his ears the only semblance of hearing he had left.

He felt Nami step away from him and he frantically reached out, trying to hold her shoulder, her hand, _something_ to tell him she was still there, but he felt nothing and fell to his knees, staring blankly ahead.

"Goodbye, Sanji," she said coolly. "You were a good servant."

She turned and left, leaving Sanji blind, deaf, mute, and hopelessly lost.

"Of course, now I must kill Luffy myself."

* * *

Luffy and Usopp traversed the forest for many hours, determined to leave the castle as far behind as possible. They picked and ate edible-seeming mushrooms and berries along the way, though they did little to satiate Luffy's appetite. Even when the storm came, they moved forward in the pouring rain.

Finally, long after the sun had set, Luffy lifted his tired head. "I hear something . . ."

Usopp nodded and they followed the sound carefully. Soon they emerged from the trees and found a rushing river running through the land.

Looking along the bank, they spotted a cottage. Its lights were on.

"Finally, a place to stay," Usopp said in relief. "Luffy, let us not delay."

Luffy nodded and they supported each other, exhausted as they were, to the cottage door.

Usopp raised his hand and knocked.


	4. Enter the Seven

**By the by, it's come to my attention that perhaps translations would be helpful, especially for this chapter. They'll be at the bottom, don't worry.**

 **/watch?v=iLINQ2bivgo**

* * *

When Queen Nami returned to the castle, one of the servants meekly asked her where the prince and Sanji were. She snapped at the poor woman, ordering her not to ask that again and to inform the castle that _she_ , her majesty, would be in the dungeons for some time. The woman bowed and scurried off to do just that. As it always was with Nami's orders, the word spread quickly through the castle and reached everyone's ears by the time she reached the dungeons.

Nami shut the heavy wooden door behind her and turned to the circular stone room. With a quick wave of her hand, the oil lamps on the walls turned themselves on, illuminating the place. On the far wall were shelves: some lined with books, both ancient and new; some with bottles, filled with odd-looking liquids or powders or dried herbs; and some with the essential instruments, the mortars and pestles and long stirring rods.

In the center sat a cauldron on a pedestal, and Nami approached this. She lifted her arms and her dress removed itself. A small pile of cloth rose up and she put these clothes on quickly. Now she wore simple peasant clothes—certainly, they were unfit for a queen such as herself, but she did not want to dirty her dress, which she sent folded up to one of the shelves. Her hair was left braided in the royal fashion.

"Such a pain," she muttered to herself, staring into the cauldron pensively. "Sanji, bring me _Magick Moste Shrewd_."

She looked up in annoyance at the lack of response and promptly remembered.

"Ah," she muttered. She sighed. "He was a good servant . . . but I'm sure he'll be clever enough to survive. Perhaps someone will take pity on him."

She shook her head and strode to one of the shelves. She took down the book she needed and quickly flipped through the contents.

"Here we are," she murmured. "'On tracking thine enemies, stalking thy love, or finding one who is lost, this brew shall assist in thy desire . . .'"

She read over the instructions and scowled.

"Himmeldonnerwetter," she hissed. "An hour to put together and an _entire day_ to sit?!"

She sighed through her nose.

"Fine, this will have to do," she muttered. "San—ah."

She grabbed liquids and powders off of the shelves and poured them carefully in a certain order into the pot.

"He cannot get very far, I'm sure," she said to herself as she seized a stirring rod and began mixing up the sludgy concoction. "Even with that damned jester at his side . . ."

She paused in her stirring and went to get a mortar and pestle to grind up a spoonful of herbs.

"Come to think of it, those spells of truth and rhyming may have held," she murmured. She smirked. "He can't truly escape."

She continued stirring, heating the cauldron, and adding various ingredients for about an hour, as the instructions had stated.

"If this doesn't work, I _will_ punish you," she hissed at the cauldron, as if it could hear her or feel any sort of fear from her threat. She lowered the lamps, changed back into her dress, and returned upstairs.

* * *

Zoro was confused.

Yes, perhaps he had been a bit late, he mused as he stared at the empty lawn of the castle. But surely he hadn't been so late for Luffy to go inside already? Normally Luffy would wait until suppertime, and the sun had not yet begun to set under the quickly gathering stormclouds. So . . .

He froze. What if something had happened to him?

What if he was in trouble?

No, surely not. Surely he'd just gone inside to escape the impending rain.

But just in case . . .

He went around to the front, approached the huge doors, took a deep breath, and knocked.

This time a servant he didn't recognize answered the door.

"Good afternoon," she murmured. "Do you have business with our Königin?"

"Not exactly," Zoro replied, dipping his head respectfully. "I was hoping to speak with Lu—Prinz Luffy."

The servant stiffened.

"I'm . . . afraid that's not possible," she murmured in a voice barely above a whisper.

"Then—" Zoro thought back. "That blond man with the strange eyebrow—?"

"Ah, Herr Sanji," the servant said. "I . . . he is not available, either."

Zoro frowned. "Then may I know why I cannot speak with them?"

"You would . . . have to take it up with Königin Nami," she said quietly, averting her eyes. "I am not privy to this information."

"Then I request an audience with her," Zoro said firmly. "It would only take a minute, would it not?"

The servant looked frightened. "It would not do to bother her at the moment, she is very busy . . ."

"I can wait."

The servant bowed and allowed Zoro inside. She asked him to wait just inside the door, and with luck the queen would be upstairs soon.

Soon, much sooner than expected, Nami appeared in the front hall. Her hair, though braided, seemed somewhat bushy, as if she'd been standing over a pot of steam. She spotted Zoro and approached him with disdainful eyes, taking in his homeless appearance.

"Do I know you?" she snapped.

Zoro bowed, lowering himself on one knee. "Meine Königin," he said respectfully, "you may not recall, but I was allowed one night's stay in this castle some time ago."

"Ah, so that was you," Nami said. "And why have you come here? This had better be worth my while, peasant. If you think you can ask for _another_ night's shelter, you are sadly mistaken."

"I wish to speak with Prinz Luffy," Zoro stated.

He looked up and saw that Nami's face had gone taut.

"Prinz Luffy," Nami said slowly, "is resting upstairs and is not to be disturbed."

"I see," Zoro said. "Thank you."

He stood, bowed, and turned to leave.

"Peasant," Nami said, and he turned back. "If I catch you setting foot inside this castle again, I will have you strung up."

Zoro nodded and hurried out.

Something was strange, he thought as he entered the woods absent-mindedly. Since when did Luffy need to rest at this time of day? He couldn't have fallen ill; he had been just fine the day before.

Perhaps the queen had been lying.

He stopped in his tracks as raindrops began to fall.

It would be news all throughout the land if Luffy was to die so suddenly, so he had to be alive. The queen wouldn't have any trouble telling him if Luffy was confined to his room, so that seemed unlikely as well.

Something was very wrong, he realized with a cold shiver that had nothing to do with the sudden downpour. As he sought a tree or bush to take shelter under, he vowed to puzzle this out in the morning, perhaps when he was _not_ lying in the mud.

* * *

Seven people—that is, people-shaped beings—sat around a cozy fire on chairs and sofas, warming themselves even as the rainstorm raged on outside.

The ones who were awake lifted their heads curiously at the knock from the front door.

"A visitor?" one of the seven said curiously, his bony hand reaching up to adjust his ascot.

"Who would come out all this way?" mumbled another one with stitches all over his body and all the way around his forehead.

"Maybe we imagined it," said the third with wavy blond hair and dark red skin.

"Stupid, we can't have all imagined the same thing," muttered the one next to him with identical skin, but wavy black hair and freckles.

The one with far too many arms and dark skin looked fondly at the two youngest of the band, undisturbed by the murmurings and curled up sleeping on their sofa.

Another knock made them jump and jolted the youngest out of their sleep.

"A visitor?" squeaked the small one with antlers and fur.

The one with blue hair rubbed her eyes. "Who's at the door?" she murmured warily.

"Go answer the door," the freckled one said, nudging the blond.

"Why don't you do it?" the blond muttered, nudging the freckled one in return.

"Because I'm tired."

"So'm I."

"Shut it, you two, we're all tired," said the stitched-up one. "I should shut myself down soon."

Another knock came, this one wearier than the last two.

"I'll do it," the one with antlers said bravely, and the one with many arms sat back with amusement, having been about to do it herself.

He trotted to the front door, reached up, and slowly pulled it open.

"Hello?" he squeaked tentatively.

He found himself staring up at a dark-skinned man with a long nose and a jester's outfit, helping support and being supported by a man about his age with mussed black hair and a nice suit. Both were very wet and dirty.

Usopp screamed, which set off the screams of the one with the antlers. The door was promptly slammed shut and the little one ran back to the others.

"So who was it?" the bony one prompted.

"Two strange men," the antlered one whimpered. "One of them screamed, and it scared me . . ."

"Yellow-belly," mumbled the freckled one.

"Hey!"

"I'm kidding."

Another knock came from the door, this one a bit timid.

"Geez . . ." muttered the one with stitches. He stood with a creaky sound. "I'll see what they want."

He went to the front door and pulled it open.

"'Lo, Herren, what brings you here?" he asked, stretching out his legs with another creaky sound.

"We've c-come seeking shelter from the c-castle," Usopp promptly replied, shivering. "If it's not a bother—"

The door was quickly shut in his face again.

". . . could we . . . stay here . . . without hassle," Usopp finished.

The stitched man hurried back to his companions.

"They're from the castle," he reported. "Come to think of it, that cute one might be Prinz Luffy himself."

"Were they sent by the Königin?" the blond one asked nervously.

"Don't know, they said something about seeking shelter."

"They may, in fact, be fleeing from Königin Nami," the one with many arms mused. "Why not hear them out?"

The others exchanged glances.

"Fair enough, but we have the right to turn them away," the freckled one said.

"This _is_ our house," the many-armed one pointed out. She stood and went to the front door, opening it for the third time in five minutes.

Usopp and Luffy looked up. Usopp clapped a hand over his mouth to stop another scream and Luffy's mouth dropped open in delighted surprise.

"Come in, get out of the rain," the woman said gently, stepping aside.

"Th-Thank you very much," Luffy said, shivering. Usopp followed and, after a gesture from the woman, they took off their shoes.

In proper light, the woman's features came into more detail. She was Indian, and her long black hair was braided back into a thick tail. She had six arms, three on each side and the extra four sprouting from her back below the normal ones. Her left eye was blue and her right was brown.

"I like your arms," Luffy said, and the woman smiled.

"Why, thank you," she said. "Prinz Luffy, isn't it?"

Luffy nodded.

"And who are you?" she added, looking at Usopp, who eyed her nervously.

"I am Usopp, Prinz Luffy's friend," he said. "I'm trying to keep him safe from beginning to end."

The woman raised an eyebrow in amusement. "I see." Adopting a motherly tone, she said, "You two look cold. Come, we have a fire going."

Their faces lit up and they followed her gratefully to the living room, but stopped short at the sight of the six before them.

"Ah, yes, we should introduce ourselves," the woman said, looking around at the others pointedly as they stared at the newcomers, who stared back, one with fear and one with amazement. "Please, don't be frightened by our appearances; I assure you, we each have our reasons for looking like we do."

"You all look fantastic!" Luffy exclaimed. The ones sitting around the fireplace looked startled.

Usopp hid behind Luffy quietly.

The woman cleared her throat. "I'll start. My name is Robin."

"I'm Franky," said the one with stitches. His skin was tan, his hair was blue and slicked back, and his chin was split twice. He wore very short shorts and a white undergarment on top.

"Nice to meet you, Herren, I'm called Brook," said the bony one cheerfully. He was very skinny, seeing as he was a literal skeleton wearing a fine suit and a fine afro upon his skull.

"'m Ace," mumbled the freckled one. Scarlet, leathery wings were folded on his backside, sticking out through slits in his undergarment, similar to Franky's.

"I'm Sabo," the blond one said. Wings identical to Ace's were folded on his backside in the same manner. The firelight shone on a large, jagged scar covering almost the whole left half of his face. The eye, in the middle of the jagged pink, moved normally but was clouded.

Everyone looked at the two youngest, who had yet to speak.

"I'm Chopper," the furry one murmured. He had a pink top hat upon his head and wore maroon shorts. His limbs had hooves at the ends.

"I'm Vivi," whispered the blue-haired one. She had dark skin like an Egyptian, her hair was braided back like Robin's (perhaps she had done the braiding for her), and her ears were pointed at the ends. Like Ace and Sabo, wings were folded on her back through slits in her shirt, but these ones looked more like butterfly wings, delicate and dark blue.

"I'm Luffy," Luffy said cheerfully. "Nice to meet you all!"

"My name's Usopp, i-it's nice to meet you," Usopp said quietly, still hiding behind Luffy. "B-Begging your pardons, but may we shelter in this lieu?"

"Hey now, you two are from the castle, aren't you?" muttered Franky, moving around his joints with that creaky sound. "What brings you all the way out here?"

"Königin Nami plans to murder him," Usopp said promptly, "and we fled, though our escape was slim."

The group of seven looked very surprised at this.

"She wants to murder you?" Chopper squeaked, staring at Luffy. "Why?"

"It seems it's because I'm cuter than her, or something," Luffy said. He bowed low. "Frauen and Herren, would you please allow me and Usopp to stay here for some time?"

Usopp quickly bowed as well.

"Really, to see royalty bowing like that . . ." Brook murmured.

"Raise your heads," Robin said gently. As they did so, she smiled and said, "You may stay. We have too many beds upstairs already."

"Thank you very much!" Luffy exclaimed. Usopp nodded, not wishing to speak.

"But perhaps you two would like to wash up first," Robin added. "Come with me, mein Prinz, Herr Usopp . . ."

* * *

By the time Luffy and Usopp had finished washing and preparing for bed, the others were already in their beds, falling asleep.

"I talked to them, and they agreed to letting you two stay," Robin murmured.

They nodded gratefully.

"Frau Robin?" Luffy said, yawning heavily. "If you don't mind me asking, what are you?"

Robin smiled. "Mein Prinz, I do mind, but only tonight; you may ask tomorrow. You look dead on your feet."

"Okay," Luffy agreed sleepily. He and Usopp allowed themselves to be led to separate beds; there were a total of ten in the room.

"We will talk in the morning," Robin promised. "Goodnight."

"G'night," Luffy mumbled.

"Goodnight, goodnight, parting is such sweet sorrow," Usopp mumbled, half-asleep. "I shall say goodnight until tonight becomes morrow."

Robin looked at him curiously before dimming the last lamp and going to bed herself.

* * *

 **And translations:**

 **Mein/Meine = My**

 **Herr = Mr/Mister**

 **Frau = Ms/Miss**

 **Herren = Gentlemen**

 **Frauen = Ladies**

 **Königin = Queen**

 **König = King**

 **Prinz = Prince**

 **Pennbruder = Tramp/Bum/Hobo (Luffy calls Zoro this in chapter one)**

 **Himmeldonnerwetter (no direct translation) = For crying out loud/For goodness' sake/Damn it/Blast it**


	5. Explanations

**I blame my cat for this late post :) It's all his fault :)**

 **(No it's not)**

* * *

Luffy and Usopp were jolted out of sleep by a rather loud and obnoxious song. They sat bolt upright and looked around wildly. Usopp jumped when he saw Brook standing by the bedroom's door, holding a violin and playing it loudly. Gray sunlight streamed through the window; the storm had passed.

The others around them woke up slowly—it seemed they were used to this sort of alarm.

"Yo-ho-ho-ho! Good morning, good morning!" Brook exclaimed, lowering his violin at last. "I trust you all slept well?"

"Yeah, before that damned song," Ace muttered.

"You don't have to be so loud," Sabo complained.

"Let us sleep in once in a while," Vivi murmured.

It was clear that these annoyed mutterings were as customary as the wake-up call.

A rather mechanical sound made Luffy and Usopp look over to Franky's bed. He sat up robotically and suddenly opened his eyes. There was a whirring sound and he blinked, looking around.

"G'morning," he said, stretching. He spotted Luffy and Usopp. "Oh, right. How'd you sleep?"

"I slept very well for the first time in a while," Usopp said. "The bed was quite comfy and not at all vile."

He immediately stopped talking as the others stared at him curiously.

Luffy cast him a sympathetic glance. "I slept well, too," he said. "Thank you all very much."

"We all have questions for each other," Robin said, "but I'm sure they can wait until after we've put some food into our bellies. Whose turn is it to cook?"

"Mine," Vivi said softly. She got out of bed and stretched her arms and wings, the frail-looking things quivering on her back. "Herr Ace, Herr Sabo, will one of you come help, please?"

"Sure," they said at the same time. They glared at each other and Sabo promptly grabbed a coin from his pocket.

"Heads I go, tails you don't," he said quickly. He flipped the coin, caught it on the back of his hand, and looked at it. "Tails, you don't go. See you soon!"

He shoved the coin back in his pocket and left the room with Vivi. Ace sighed.

Luffy frowned. "Wait . . . that wasn't fair."

"Huh?" Ace said.

"He said he goes if it was heads, and you don't if it was tails. Either way, he went."

Ace's eyes widened comically. "That jerk!" he yelled. "He's been doing that all this time!" He looked around. "Why didn't any of you tell me?!"

"It was funny," Franky said. The others nodded.

"I didn't realize it, either," Chopper whispered.

Ace groaned as one of his hands began glowing and smoldering. "I will get him back for this, mark my words . . ."

"Herr Ace, your hand," Brook said quietly. Ace glanced down and shook his hand vigorously, dimming the glow and leaving only a faint smell of smoke. Luffy and Usopp stared in fascination.

"Hey, you said Königin Nami wants to kill you because you're cuter than her, right?" Ace said curiously. Luffy nodded.

"It must be true," Robin said. "You're very cute, mein Prinz, if I may say so."

Luffy looked surprised, but then grinned. "Wow, thank you! The only other who's said that . . . was . . ."

His grin faded. "Never mind."

Usopp raised his eyebrows in understanding while the others seemed confused. They didn't bother asking Luffy to elaborate, however.

"Are you the castle jester?" Chopper asked Usopp, looking him up and down.

"I used to work as such for our Königin," Usopp said. "But for two years and some, I've not done it again."

He sighed, annoyed at his own mouth for spilling those words.

"Forgive me," Brook said politely, still standing by the door, "but you seem a tad stressed, Herr Usopp. May I lift your spirits with a song?"

"You may try, Herr Brook, if you so desire," Usopp responded wearily. "Any lower than this and I may be a crier."

Brook lifted his violin and began playing an upbeat, jaunty tune. Gradually the feeling of happiness filled everyone in the room and they smiled. Luffy and Chopper cheerfully clapped along.

By the time Sabo gave the breakfast call, everyone's spirits had been noticeably lifted as Brook had promised. Usopp was, however briefly, lifted out of his gloom and wore a small smile as he followed Luffy and everyone else downstairs.

The kitchen was small and cramped with nine hungry residents around one table. Breakfast, they saw as Vivi served up the plates, was a simple combination of fried eggs, cheese on bread, and tea with honey. Though this was far less food than Luffy was used to, he remembered his manners and did not complain. Usopp, on the other hand, had not seen proper food for two years, and the thought of complaining never once crossed his mind.

"Thank you, Frau Vivi," Luffy said as his stomach rumbled.

"Yes, thank you for this food," Usopp said gratefully. "I'll make sure it's well-chewed."

Vivi smiled as the others thanked her as well. "It's no trouble," she said softly as she and Sabo sat down. "I hope you all enjoy."

The ones with wings had them folded on their backsides, and Robin had her extra hands folded neatly in her lap. Everyone began eating. The food, though simple, was delicious, and when they told Vivi this, her cheeks turned a blue as deep as her eyes. Franky and Brook were the only ones who simply sat at the table with everyone without eating a thing.

* * *

When their bellies were full, the troupe went to the living room and sat around the couches. The sun had risen and faintly warmed the room without the need for a fire; the fireplace was now cold and empty.

"Let's make these questions quick," Robin suggested. "Most of us have to travel to the village by afternoon."

"May I go first?" Luffy asked. The others nodded and he promptly said, "What are you all, if not human?"

"I'm part-demon," Robin said, blinking her mismatched eyes. "I don't quite know the circumstances of my birth. In any case, that's why I have six arms." She shrugged all six at once. "I can add and subtract eyes when I wish, but I usually don't do this."

A brown eye sprouted on Luffy's hand. He stared at it in delight before it vanished.

"I'm an automaton," Franky said bluntly. "I used to be human, but my body was failing me, so I built this one and put my brain into it."

Luffy tilted his head curiously. "How?"

Franky paused. "Huh. How _did_ I do that? Anyway, I don't need food; I keep my joints oiled up and I'm steam-powered."

"Steam?" Luffy said curiously.

A burst of steam emitted from Franky's rear.

"Steam," he said. "I shut myself down every night and set my clock to turn my system back on at a certain time every morning."

Luffy nodded in wonder.

"Sabo and I are half-'ifrit," Ace said.

"We're twins," Sabo added.

Luffy narrowed his eyes. "You don't look like twins . . ."

"Twins don't have to look alike," Ace pointed out. "It seems our mother was unable to have children, and she found an 'ifrit in a lamp and begged for help. But . . ."

"He impregnated her with his own essence, so here we are," Sabo finished.

"So you two have _fire powers_ ," Luffy whispered in awe.

They nodded and simultaneously held up their hands, letting flame sprout in their palms. The fires quickly died down again.

"But we can't turn to smoke like a full 'ifrit," Ace said.

"Still," Luffy said happily.

"I'm a skeleton," Brook said helpfully.

"I think they can see that," Ace pointed out.

"I was brought back to life by a necromancer," Brook said dramatically, ignoring Ace. "But he was frightened of what he had wrought, and abandoned me! Frankly, I don't know how long my time in my second life shall last. If it lasts as long as that magician's life, then I suppose I have a good while left, at least."

"And you're a musician?" Luffy said happily.

Brook nodded. "As well as a kind of hypnotist, if you will. That is, I'm able to heighten certain emotions with my music if I will it to be so."

"Ah, that would explain the mood change," Usopp exclaimed. "When you said that, I'd thought you were deranged. In that case, I apologize for thinking as such; at music, you truly have a magic touch."

Brook chuckled. "Why, thank you, Herr Usopp."

"I'm half-reindeer and half-human," Chopper piped up. "I don't remember how it happened. And I'm a doctor!"

"That's amazing!" Luffy exclaimed.

Chopper grinned shyly. "I'm not happy about that compliment at all!" he exclaimed happily.

Luffy and Usopp glanced up at Vivi expectantly. She nervously played with her hair.

"I'm a faery," she murmured.

"Huh, I thought faeries were smaller," Luffy remarked.

Vivi shook her head. "This is an average height . . . I think. I don't really have any special powers . . ."

"Don't be so modest," Ace said gently. "You can make balls of light. That's pretty special."

She blushed. "But all faeries can do that . . ."

"Balls of light?" Luffy said.

Vivi held up a small hand and a sun-like ball formed in her palm. She quickly closed her fist and it went out.

"That is so cool," Luffy said happily. Vivi smiled nervously.

"We'll make our questions quick," Robin promised. "Why are you two fleeing from the castle?"

"As said last night, Königin Nami plots murder," Usopp said promptly. "She—"

Luffy covered Usopp's mouth with his hand. Muffled words in a poetry-like fashion were indistinguishable, and Luffy didn't move his hand until Usopp had stopped talking.

"I'll explain," he said, removing his hand. Usopp rubbed his mouth. "Stepmother, Königin Nami, seems to be obsessed with being the cutest. Apparently, I'm cuter than her, so she wants me dead." He frowned. "And I guess that would stop me from becoming König as well."

"I know a necromancer," Brook offered.

Luffy laughed. "I'll pass! Anyway, a couple years ago, stepmother turned Usopp into a mirror and put spells on him to make him speak only in rhyme and truth. She accidentally broke the mirror curse, but he's still forced to speak in truthful rhyme, and he has to answer questions directed to him."

Usopp punctuated this with little nods.

"So Usopp escaped and warned me," Luffy continued. He frowned. "We weren't too far from the castle when one of the servants, Sanji, came for me. He'd been ordered to kill me, but he hesitated. I had to punch him and we got away." He sighed. "I like Sanji. I hope he's okay . . ."

"Well, that explains a lot," Sabo said. "And here I thought Herr Usopp was rhyming because he was a weirdo."

Usopp glared at him.

"Do you know any limericks?" Ace asked.

"There once was a man from old France," Usopp recited, "who'd never had time to learn dance; One day he had tried, but of shame he died, when fell to the floor did his pants."

Luffy, Ace, Sabo, and Franky snickered. Usopp sighed.

"Sorry to break up the party, but we should get going," Franky said, standing. "We've got jobs to get to. We'll tell you about them later."

He, Ace, Sabo, Robin, and Brook went for the front door and got on their footwear. Robin covered up her arms with a large cloak and they departed, heading along the river to the nearest village.

Luffy, Usopp, Vivi, and Chopper waved farewell until their friends were out of sight.

"Chopper and I watch the house while they work," Vivi said softly. She smiled nervously at Luffy and Usopp. "Mein Prinz, Herr Usopp, I'm sorry if our hospitality is unfitting . . ."

"No, it's fine!" Luffy said reassuringly. "You guys are awesome!"

Chopper did a little dance while insisting that Luffy's compliment was not true at all, and Vivi simply looked surprised.

"I hope we'll be able to keep you safe is all," she said, her smile fading. "If the Königin comes here, by chance . . ."

"Then we'll run," Luffy said decidedly. "I wouldn't want to put you all in danger."

* * *

So, Luffy was missing.

Zoro looked up in thought as he leaned against a tree.

Luffy was missing . . . and the queen had not told him.

He wasn't dead, and probably wasn't sick . . .

He was missing.

Zoro sighed. Back to square one.

If he was missing, where could he have gone, and more importantly, why?

Zoro scratched his head.

Perhaps Luffy had run away.

But why?

Zoro groaned. His head was starting to hurt, and all the thinking was only making the worry gnaw at his gut further. The most he could do was simply search for Luffy himself, perhaps in a nearby village.

That is, if he could _find_ a nearby village.

He looked around, closed his eyes, spun in a circle, and pointed. He opened his eyes and went in that direction.

Surely he had to run into someone else no matter _which_ direction he went in.

Why, look, there was someone right now—

Zoro stopped and narrowed his eyes. A man with blond hair was walking slowly through the trees, his arms out in front of him.

Something about that hair was familiar . . .

"Hey!" Zoro yelled.

No response. Zoro frowned and approached the blond man, stepping directly in front of him. Just as he'd thought—it was that servant from the castle. But something was wrong. Zoro's presence seemed to be unnoticed, and the servant only seemed to realize he was there when his outstretched hands felt the barricading torso.

The blond—no, wait, his name was Sanji, Zoro remembered—frowned and felt Zoro's torso up and down slowly. Zoro stared at him. His blond hair was matted with mud, and his suit, though fine, was equally filthy. His hands were caked with dirt. His visible eye stared straight ahead as if blind.

Sanji, apparently realizing that he was facing someone else, blindly took a step back and swung his head from side-to-side nervously.

"Hey," Zoro said loudly. "What's wrong with you?"

Sanji didn't react to his voice at all, instead taking another step back and one to the side. Suddenly he lost his balance and fell into the mud. Shaking his head, he pushed himself up and got back his balance.

Zoro waved a hand in front of Sanji's face. No reaction.

"HEY!"

No response.

Zoro narrowed his eyes and grabbed Sanji's wrist. Sanji immediately started panicking, trying to wrench his arm out of Zoro's grip and blindly kicking in the general direction of Zoro's crotch.

"Whoa, whoa, stop with the kicks," Zoro said warningly. "Look, I don't know what happened to you, but you look terrible."

Sanji's stomach growled and he slowly ceased his kicking, suddenly looking very weak.

"Come on," Zoro said, yanking Sanji's wrist. Sanji stumbled forward, almost falling again. "I'll find a doctor to get your arse off my hands, but in the meantime, let's try to find something to eat."

He started walking and Sanji, his wrist still in an iron grip, blindly followed, putting his trust in this supposed stranger for now—not that he had much of a choice.


	6. Problems and Solutions

"Please, make yourselves at home," Vivi said softly as they went to the living room. Luffy and Usopp sat on one couch while Vivi and Chopper took another, Chopper's legs stretched out in front of him and Vivi's legs were folded underneath her.

Chopper shifted in his spot and glanced between Luffy and Usopp hesitantly.

"What is it?" Luffy asked.

"Prinz Luffy, I have a question, but . . ." Chopper glanced to the side. "It's for Herr Usopp, and . . ." he looked at Usopp now. "I don't think you like rhyming, so I don't want to make you say anything, since you said you have to answer all questions directed at you."

Luffy glanced at Usopp, who gave him a shrug, turned to Chopper, and gestured for him to speak.

"Oh, so it's okay," Chopper said in relief. "I was wondering . . . you can only tell the truth in rhyme, but are the words like that when you're thinking of them?"

"In my silent thoughts, my words may be prose and lies," Usopp said. "But when I speak, they turn into rhyming, truthful sighs."

"I see," Chopper said, nodding. "I have another question . . ."

Usopp nodded.

"Is there any way to break the spell?"

"Königin Nami cast these chains, and I believe there are three ways to lift them, with pains; if she breaks it on her own, if she lost her magic, or rotted to the bone."

"I think he means if she died, for that last one," Luffy said quickly.

Chopper shivered. "Trying to kill Königin Nami seems far too dangerous."

"Have you ever met her?" Luffy asked, glancing between Chopper and Vivi.

"No," Chopper admitted. "But we seven can barely afford food thanks to her laws. We're lucky that Franky and Brook don't need to eat. And she must be very powerful, since things are this bad and no one's done anything."

"She is," Luffy mumbled. He sighed and bowed to Chopper and Vivi, much to their surprise. "I'm very sorry; I can't do anything but apologize for her actions. I may be her stepson, but I don't know what kind of punishment she would deal me if I tried to stop her." He straightened. "In any case, she _is_ trying to kill me, so I suppose family means nothing to her."

"Please, there's no need to apologize, mein Prinz," Vivi exclaimed in surprise. "I'm sure you couldn't have stopped her if you tried—" she blinked. "That is, not to say you're incompetent, I just—"

Luffy nodded. "I understand," he said quickly.

Usopp shifted in his seat, hesitating. Finally he sighed and decided to open his mouth.

"If you don't mind, how did you come to live together?" he asked Vivi and Chopper. "I only wonder since you're all so unique from one another."

They were both quiet for a moment. Chopper was the first to speak up.

"I used to live in Scandinavia," he said. "As far back as I can remember . . . no one liked me because of what I was. I'm a reindeer who walks on two legs, and can talk, and has a blue nose . . . I came here eventually. One day Robin found me in the woods and offered to let me live with her, Franky, Brook, Ace, and Sabo. So I said yes." He grinned. "I love it here."

Luffy and Usopp smiled at this happy ending.

Vivi cleared her throat. "A couple of years ago," she said, her voice quaking a bit, "I lived south of here, in a different kingdom. There . . . was a forest fire, and I lost my parents. I barely got away. I met with everyone else here . . . things are good now." She smiled nervously. "Herren Ace and Sabo scared me a bit at first, but I'm not afraid now. They're very kind . . . everyone is."

"You're both so lucky," Luffy remarked, smiling. "Everyone here is so understanding and nice. They didn't turn either of you away, and even though I'm sort of related to Königin Nami, none of you left Usopp or me out in the rain."

"Who would leave someone out in the rain?" Chopper squeaked. "Especially in a storm like that!"

Luffy and Usopp glanced at each other.

"Stepmother," Luffy said quietly.

"Oh," Vivi murmured.

Luffy sighed. "I do wish I could be König."

"What's stopping you?" Chopper asked.

"I have to be of age and led to the altar," Luffy explained. "I'm of age, but I haven't married yet. And I want to marry for . . . for love, not just for the throne."

"So you have no one you love?" Vivi asked softly.

Luffy looked up. "No, there is someone," he said. He grinned. "His name's Zoro! He's the best! His hair's this amazing shade of green, and he's so sweet—" his hands flew to his cheeks as he talked and his smile grew wider. "He's so good at hugging, he's really good at drinking beer, he smells really good even if he hasn't had a bath, he's so beautiful and his smile is so great, and, oh, what else is there—? I just love everything about him!"

"Goodness," Vivi said, smiling. "He sounds wonderful. Do you two plan to marry?"

Luffy's smile faded. "The thing is . . . I haven't been able to tell him how I feel." He quickly explained the situation. "And in any case, with stepmother out to kill me, I get the feeling now wouldn't be the best time to marry him." He sighed. "I want to see him again . . ."

"I'm sure you'll be able to," Chopper said. He grinned. "Love will find a way!"

With this, Luffy's smile was back. "I hope so," he exclaimed.

* * *

Some time passed before Vivi and Chopper began work on lunch. It was a vegetarian meal, according to their own preferences. Despite Luffy's love for meat, he did not complain, and Usopp was just happy to be able to eat in the first place.

"It would be warmer if Herr Ace or Herr Sabo were here," Vivi murmured. "I'm sorry."

"Don't worry yourself, it's delicious," Luffy said quickly.

"You must be used to bigger and finer meals," Chopper said.

Luffy shrugged. "Perhaps, but stepmother often takes dinner away, so I can deal with smaller portions. Besides, this cooking may not be as good as Sanji's, but it's very good!"

"Thank you," Vivi and Chopper said, ducking their heads in embarrassment.

Luffy frowned to himself, but chose not to voice his worries and continued eating with the others.

After lunch was done, the four retired to the living room again. After the food, they all looked rather sleepy.

"Say, Frau Vivi," Luffy said suddenly. "Those wings . . . can you fly?"

Vivi nodded. She unfolded her wings, stood, and began flapping them. They picked up speed, almost like a hummingbird or dragonfly, and she crossed her legs in midair and hovered.

Luffy's eyes shone with wonder. Usopp, too, looked delighted.

"My body structure is different from a human's, though we look similar," Vivi explained shyly, stretching her legs out to the floor and slowly ceasing the flapping of her wings. "I'm not sure of the exact differences, but all in all, I'm very light."

Luffy stood and gestured to her with his arms held out. She allowed herself to be picked up gently and his eyes widened.

"Wow," he murmured, gently setting her back down.

She sat back on the couch and yawned. This set Luffy off, which in turn set off Usopp and Chopper. Within moments Chopper had fallen fast asleep.

"I think that's our cue for a nap," Vivi murmured. "Mein Prinz, Herr Usopp . . . ?"

"We'll join you," Luffy said, smiling even as he yawned again.

* * *

"Finally . . ."

Nami bent over her cauldron, wearing her shabbier clothes in favor of not damaging her finer ones with the fumes. She coughed and peered into the iridescent liquid.

Speaking clearly, she said, "Show me Prinz Luffy."

The liquid's surface shimmered and waved like oil on water and the shining colors slowly formed an image. Inside the liquid, Nami saw Luffy. He was with Usopp and two others she didn't recognize—a blue-haired girl with pointed ears and folded wings (a faery, perhaps?) and something like a small animal wearing clothes. The girl and the animal were curled up on a couch, fast asleep, and Luffy and Usopp were likewise sleeping, their heads propped up against each other.

Nami frowned and waved her hand over the image. It slowly shrank until she saw the outside of the cottage and its surroundings.

"By the riverbank . . . just outside of the woods," she murmured to herself. "A few hours by foot . . ."

She strode to her books, skimmed the titles, and drew out one. She quickly flicked through the pages.

"Too messy," she muttered to herself as she skimmed. "Too complicated, too many lizards . . ."

She paused at one page.

"What's this one . . ." she murmured. "Powerful poison . . . yes, this looks good . . . is there an antidote . . . ?"

She frowned.

"'The poison can only be cured with true love's kiss,'" she read aloud slowly.

She smirked and laughed out loud.

"How ridiculous!" she exclaimed. "That fool is far too naïve to even know what love is! And who would he love in the first place?!"

She set the book next to the cauldron.

"And even if he did love someone, I can easily find out who," she murmured. "In any case . . . who are those two he and Usopp are with . . . ? I suppose they are sheltering him . . . no matter."

She looked up in thought. "I suppose if they don't get in my way, I won't punish them for letting him take cover there."

She rolled up her sleeves.

"I'll finish the poison today and set out tomorrow," she decided, hurrying to the shelves.

* * *

The sun was setting both on the land and on Zoro's mood.

"Can't believe I haven't found a village yet," he grumbled to himself as he led Sanji along by his wrist. "Been following whoever's footprints these are for hours, how can I have gotten nowhere?"

He glanced back at Sanji. "You're probably tired and hungry too, but just hold out a little longer, I'll find someone to help you. I've got my own problems, and they don't involve you."

Sanji said nothing. Zoro knew that Sanji couldn't hear him, but it was almost convincing to his own ears when he said aloud that he _would_ find someone to help instead of being forced to camp in the woods with company.

When Zoro heard footsteps up ahead, he stopped suddenly, and Sanji bumped into him. Sanji froze now, too, realizing something must be wrong.

A strange troupe came their way: A man with working clothes and stitches all over his body; a woman wearing a large cloak which covered up her whole torso; two young men with black and blond hair respectively, as well as fiery red skin; and a tall, skinny man with a suit, mask, and gloves, holding a violin case.

When they saw Zoro and Sanji, they stopped, and for a moment everyone except Sanji simply stood staring.

Then Zoro cleared his throat. "Frankly, you all look very suspicious, but I'm a bit desperate here."

The woman cocked an eyebrow and smiled. "Nice to meet you, too, Herr Pennbruder. Is there something we can help you with?"

"This guy here—" Zoro pulled Sanji forward, making him stumble. "There's something wrong with him, and I think he needs a doctor. I've been following these footprints for a while trying to find a village, but no luck so far." He gestured to the footprints leading a ways ahead of him. "Do you know anyone who could help, or . . . ?"

"We know a doctor," the black-haired red-skinned one said. He glanced around at the others. "Do you think it'd be okay to let this guy stay with us until he's fit?"

"We do have an extra bed," the tall man remarked. "I have no problems with this."

The others nodded.

"Thank you very much," Zoro said in relief, bowing briefly. He pushed Sanji forward, who straightened up and turned his head this way and that blindly.

"Er . . . who is he, exactly?" the man with stitches asked. "What's wrong with him?"

Zoro sighed. "One of the servants from the castle. I don't know what happened, but I don't think he can hear or see. I ran into him earlier . . . he seemed lost."

The blond red-skinned one slowly reached out and took Sanji's hand. Sanji stiffened and slowly felt the unfamiliar hand. Unbeknownst to Zoro, a touch of warmth was sent through the palm, and Sanji smiled faintly.

"We'll watch over him for the time being," the cloaked woman promised. "Would you like to come as well?"

Zoro shook his head. "Sorry, but I really should find a village. I'm looking for someone."

"Who?" the tall man asked.

Zoro smiled. "I don't think you'd believe me if I told you. In any case, thank you and goodbye."

He bowed again and left, following the footprints. As he grew smaller and smaller in the distance, the five couldn't help but notice that Zoro's boots left exactly the same prints as the ones he was following.

"Well," Sabo said, turning to Sanji, who stared blankly ahead. "I don't know if blindness or deafness can be cured, but I'll bet Chopper's going to try."

"He must be exhausted," Robin murmured.

"That guy said he was one of the castle servants," Franky remarked. "But he was definitely a beggar himself, so . . . how does he know someone from the castle?"

"Perhaps Prinz Luffy knows that man," Ace said thoughtfully as they started walking, Sabo carefully leading Sanji along. "We can ask him when we get back . . ."


	7. Rest

**As you may have realized by now, I'm an idiot.**

 **When I was describing the seven living in the cottage, I completely forgot to mention Sabo's scar.  
In any case, I went back and added it to chapter 4. **

* * *

Vivi, Chopper, Luffy, and Usopp were awoken by the sound of the front door opening. The sun had set and the others had returned.

"Heigh-hum, heigh-hum, it's home from work we've come!" Brook called.

"Welcome back," Vivi and Chopper called as Luffy and Usopp sat up attentively.

"We brought beer from the market," Robin said from the entryway. "We can have it with dinner."

"Dinner," Luffy murmured, his stomach growling.

"I think I'll pass," Vivi said quietly. "I'm not good at handling alcohol," she added to Luffy and Usopp.

"Who's cooking tonight?" Chopper called. He sniffed the air and frowned. "Um . . . which one of you is all dirty?"

"It's my turn," Franky said. "And we brought someone with us who _really_ needs a bath."

At this, the four curiously left the living room and came to the entryway to investigate. While Vivi and Chopper looked surprised and nervous (both quietly hid around the corner, Chopper's head behind the wall and his body sticking out), Luffy and Usopp gasped.

Sanji stood with his wrist held firmly in Sabo's hand. His eyes were darting around as if he was trying to figure out where he was. He didn't seem to notice Luffy and Usopp.

"Sanji!" Luffy cried.

" _This_ is Herr Sanji?" Ace asked in surprise. "He's not usually like this, is he?"

"Like what?" Luffy asked. He looked at Sanji and frowned. "Hey, Sanji? Are you okay?"

"Apparently he's gone deaf and blind," Robin said. "I'm not entirely sure he can speak, either, but with his hearing gone, it probably makes no difference to him."

Luffy's eyes slowly traveled up Sanji, taking in his filthy appearance, his darting, unseeing eyes, and his air of nervousness.

He pressed his lips together and reached a hand up to Sanji's face, touching the side. Sanji froze and grabbed at the unknown hand, pulling it off and backing away directly into Franky. Sanji whipped around and turned his head this way and that as if searching for a way out.

Luffy grabbed Sanji's wrists and turned him around to face him. Sanji's eyes were wide with panic.

"What did she do to you?" Luffy whispered.

No response, of course, but without any apparent danger, the panic faded some from Sanji's face.

"She?" Robin murmured. "You don't mean Königin Nami?"

"Sanji was sent to kill me, but he didn't," Luffy said slowly, searching Sanji's face for some light of recognition. "Stepmother must have been furious, and she can use magic, so . . ."

"That's awful," Sabo said sympathetically. "But . . . are you fine with this, Prinz Luffy? If he was sent to kill you . . ."

"He didn't want to kill me in the first place," Luffy said. "And even if he wanted to finish the job, I don't think he knows who I am."

Usopp cleared his throat and tapped Luffy's shoulder. He gestured to Sanji, and then himself.

"You want to try," Luffy said, making sure it wasn't a question. "Okay."

He stepped aside and now Usopp took one of Sanji's hands in his own. He brought the hand up to his face slowly and, once he'd made it clear that it was a face Sanji was feeling, brought the hand to his nose. Sanji's hand felt up and down the protruding feature—and suddenly a light of recognition lit in his unseeing eyes. He smiled in relief and mouthed, _Usopp . . ._

"Oh, he recognizes you," Luffy said in delight.

"That nose is pretty unique," Franky remarked.

"You're one to talk," Ace said, nudging him. "Hey, Prinz Luffy, Herr Usopp . . ."

They looked up. Usopp kept a reassuring grip on Sanji's wrist.

"If you two—" Ace looked at Vivi and Chopper. "And you two—" he looked back at Luffy and Usopp. "Are okay with it, we might need to let Herr Sanji stay here for some time."

The four in question nodded.

"So, first off, he needs a bath," Ace continued. "I and someone else can take him to the river and get him clean. We've got fresh undergarments that he can wear. After that he should probably have something to eat."

Luffy and Usopp nodded in agreement. "I'll go with you for the bath," Luffy volunteered. "Sanji's helped me out so many times and I want to return it. Besides, I need a bath, too."

Usopp pointed to himself and mimed the sun rising.

"'I'll take a bath tomorrow morning,' he says," Luffy translated. Usopp nodded.

"Right then," Franky said, clapping his hands together with a metallic _clink_. "I'll start cooking up dinner, you two can take care of Herr Sanji . . . and Chopper, can you check him over when they're back?"

"Of course," Chopper said, eyeing Sanji as he stepped out from around the corner with Vivi.

Usopp gave Sanji's hands to Luffy and Ace, who tugged and led Sanji out the front door. The night was cool, but warmer than the previous one, thanks to the lack of rain.

"With all respect, mein Prinz, it's time to strip," Ace said, taking off his shirt and pants and leaving him in nothing but drawers. Luffy cheerfully did the same and they both helped Sanji get off his clothes. Though he resisted at first, Luffy made him kneel and feel the river to show him that it was time for a bath. After this he was more compliant.

They slowly led Sanji into the river and all three shivered. The water was warmer where Ace was and they stood near him.

As they began rinsing out the dirt from Sanji's matted hair, Luffy's eyes were drawn to something on Ace's chest. His eyes widened.

"What happened?" he asked in awe.

A large, pink, and shiny scar was in the middle of Ace's torso. Ace was quiet at first, but briefly turned, and Luffy saw an identical mark on his back. It was as if someone had blasted a cannonball through him.

"It's a long story," Ace murmured, concentrating on a spot of dirt on Sanji's left shoulder. "Sabo and I . . . we were in a big fight a long time ago. We barely got away with just our scars."

Luffy remembered the scar covering nearly the whole left half of Sabo's face, and the clouded eye . . .

"I don't want to talk about it," Ace said abruptly. "Forgive me if that's rude."

"No, it's okay," Luffy said quickly. "I understand."

Ace grinned and they kept at their work in silence—until Luffy brought up a handful of water and splashed Ace's face.

Dripping with water now, Ace glowered at Luffy, who was laughing at his expression. Ace grinned mischievously and brought up a handful, splashing it into Luffy's face.

This started a splashing war between the two, filled with childish giggles and whoops. After some time they remembered their task and got out of the river, leading Sanji out with them, and got their clothes back on.

When they came back to the cottage, they found that Robin (it had to have been Robin) had laid out the fresh clothes. They helped Sanji into these and Ace placed his palms on Sanji, slowly running them down his body to heat him up. Sanji sighed as the cold river water burned off of him, leaving him clean and dry.

* * *

Dinner was just as good as lunch and breakfast had been. Usopp helped Sanji eat, and Sanji seemed to enjoy it as well.

After the meal was over, the ten retreated to the living room. Ace and Sabo lit up the fireplace with a _whoomph_ and a _crackling_ of the flames. Luffy made sure Sanji was comfortable by the fireside as Chopper gave him a checkup. Sanji squirmed, but Luffy gently held him down.

The flames licked up the logs and the light danced, reflecting off of everyone's eyes, giving an odd glowing effect to the whites.

"I should chop up more firewood soon," Franky murmured, breaking the calm.

"Oh, everyone . . ." Luffy straightened his posture and bowed from where he sat. "Thank you so much for bringing Sanji here, and taking care of him like this . . . I don't know what would have happened to him without you." He straightened back up.

"It's no trouble," Brook said reassuringly. "He was already being taken care of, but that man asked us to take him off his hands and bring him to a doctor."

Chopper finished checking Sanji over and sat back down.

"That reminds me," Robin said. "Prinz Luffy, Herr Sanji was with a peasant when we found them, but the peasant seemed to know him. I don't suppose you know any peasants . . . ?"

"A peasant . . . who knows Sanji?" Luffy murmured. He looked at her. "Don't tell me . . . what color was his hair?"

"Why, green," Robin said.

Luffy's eyes widened and he gasped loud enough to make Chopper and Vivi jump. "But—that's Zoro! That must have been Zoro!"

"Zoro?" Sabo asked curiously.

"He was a weirdo, if you ask me," Franky said, rubbing his chin. "He was following his own footsteps in circles."

"That's definitely Zoro," Luffy said, grinning from ear to ear now. "Oh, I'm so glad he's okay!"

After some happy bouncing where he sat, he explained the situation.

"That's so sweet," Robin said, smiling.

"I want to go out and look for him," Luffy said. He jumped up. "I'll go right now!"

"You're joking," Brook exclaimed. "It's far too late, mein Prinz! The sun has long set, and even if Frau Vivi accompanied you with her lights, it's very easy to get lost in these woods if you don't know where you're going!"

Luffy slowly sat back down, sagging into the couch. "But . . . Zoro . . ."

"We promise we'll keep an eye out for him," Ace offered. "We go through those woods every day on our way to and from work. If we see him, we'll tell him you want to talk to him."

Luffy grinned. "Oh, would you? Thank you so much!"

Usopp cleared his throat. "By the by, where is it you work? Is one a blacksmith and another a clerk?"

"Close," Sabo admitted. "Ace and I work with Franky . . ."

"And I'm a toymaker," Franky completed. "Little windup things. I could make fifty a day."

"We light the fires," Ace explained.

"I work as an assistant in a bookstore," Robin said. She chuckled. "When my boss found out about my anatomy, she only said, 'Well, more arms means you can work twice as fast.'"

"I cover up my bones and perform with the local theater troupe," Brook said cheerfully. "I'd like to think I'm quite popular."

"You are," Sabo said.

Chopper cleared his throat. "A-hem! After examining Herr Sanji, I've concluded that he is indeed deaf, blind, and mute. Like Prinz Luffy said, it must have been a curse, since there's no sign of injury and his senses were fine a few days ago—right?" he asked, glancing at Luffy.

"Right," Luffy said, nodding.

"And there you have it," Chopper concluded.

Ace grinned. "You're a great doctor. Thanks, Chopper."

Chopper grinned. "Your compliment doesn't make me happy at all!" He yawned. "You bastard . . ."

"I think that's our cue for bedtime," Robin said gently, noticing that Vivi was also yawning and Sanji was struggling to keep his eyes open.

Everyone stood and headed upstairs after putting out the fire. Luffy helped Sanji into bed and got him under the covers. Sanji quickly fell asleep—he must have been worn out from the events of the past two days.

"Next time I see her, I'll punch her, I don't care what she says," Luffy muttered under his breath. As Franky powered himself down, Luffy climbed into bed and fell asleep with the others, leaving the house dark and quiet as a shadow.

* * *

 **Starting next week we'll be updating on Tuesdays!**


	8. And You're to Blame

Nami peered into the cauldron and smirked wickedly. Just as the instructions had stated, the poison was a deep, opaque green, sitting pretty like a tavern cocktail.

Earlier she had called for a basket of apples to be brought to her, for of course Luffy would never drink the poison by itself, and though she knew how fond he was of meat, anything like that surely wouldn't keep well for the journey. Besides, he liked apples well enough.

She seized an apple, held it by its stem, and dipped it carefully into the poison. A moment later she drew it out; the shining red had turned to a deep green. Surely Luffy would pick the "special" apple out of all the others.

She carefully placed the green apple back into the basket and waved her hand over the cauldron. The contents vanished and she quickly set to work making something new.

This potion did not take long. Nami snatched a vial, scooped some up, held her nose, and drank it straight down. She slammed the vial back down and hunched over.

When she straightened up, her appearance had changed drastically. She now bore the looks of an old woman, with flyaway white hair, crow's feet, and wrinkled hands.

"I should hurry," she said to herself with a toad-like voice. "This will wear off sooner or later . . ."

She bent, picked up the basket of apples, and went upstairs. She left the castle with no announcement—the servants would not have recognized her, and if all went as planned, she would be back before sunset in any case.

* * *

The cottage was woken by Brook's prompt sunrise salute. Once everyone had sat up, still sleepy, he ceased his humming music and cheerfully bade them good morning.

"Oh, dear," he remarked, glancing to where Sanji still slept. "I suppose Herr Sanji cannot hear my music . . ."

"I'll get him," Luffy said. He went to Sanji's bed and gently shook him. "Hey, Sanji. Time to get up."

Sanji stirred and opened his eyes, unseeing as they were. He blinked sleepily and brushed a few strands of hair away.

"Morning, Sanji," Luffy said cheerfully. He touched Sanji's hand carefully. "We'll have breakfast soon, okay?"

Sanji hesitantly held Luffy's hand. Luffy grinned and helped Sanji out of bed.

"It's my turn to cook," Robin said, stretching her many limbs. "Ace, would you come help?"

"Yeah," Ace agreed easily.

"Frau Robin?" Luffy said as he made Sanji balance on his feet. "I was wondering, if it's okay . . ."

"Yes?"

"How do you handle having so many arms?"

Robin laughed. "I'm sure the man with one arm would ask you the same question, mein Prinz."

Luffy looked surprised but soon laughed in return. "Good point!"

Robin smiled and went downstairs with Ace to start on breakfast.

"I bet she's really handy with things," Luffy said cheerfully.

Usopp snickered quietly.

"What is it?" Luffy asked. Then his eyes widened. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean—"

"The reason I laughed, Luffy, is because," Usopp said promptly. "Your unwitting pun was worthy of applause."

He sighed.

"Sorry," Luffy said quietly. He brightened. "I see what you mean, though."

Vivi quietly sat next to Usopp and patted his shoulder. He looked at her in surprise.

"Sorry," she murmured, quickly withdrawing her hand.

He shook his head and smiled. She hesitantly smiled in return.

"Brook, can I ask you something?" Luffy asked curiously.

Brook chuckled and sat down. "I believe you just have; but yes, you may ask me one more thing."

Luffy grinned and sat down, bringing Sanji with him. "When did you die? What was it like?"

Brook stared off into the distance—or so it seemed, for he had no eyes.

"When I died, König Dragon was still in power," he said slowly.

"Oh, that's father!" Luffy exclaimed. "I never knew him, but I heard he was a good man."

Brook nodded. "That's absolutely correct. Never had I known such a just ruler. Perhaps not kind, but just." He looked at Luffy now. "I believe I recall attending your christening party, mein Prinz. I'm sure it was wonderful."

"You believe?" Luffy asked. The others were silent, for they'd heard this story before.

Brook shrugged. "The last few days before my death are . . . fuzzy, shall we say. I don't remember how I died, but if this crack in my skull is any indicator . . ." he gestured to the curved crack above his right eye socket. "I may have been struck over the head."

Luffy's eyes were wide. He'd always been good at listening to stories.

"In any case, I don't recall anything after that," Brook continued. "The next thing I know, my flesh has rotted away, I'm walking and talking again, and some poor man in front of me is scared out of his wits." He chuckled. "All I did was ask for directions to the nearest tavern."

"That's really neat," Luffy murmured. "I bet you've had some interesting experiences."

Brook chuckled again. "Oh, I wouldn't say so. I led as normal a life as anyone else, I'm sure. And death, for that matter! I spent some time looking for a place to stay, though was often rejected due to my . . . appearance. Luckily I came upon Frau Robin. We traveled together for a while before finding Herr Franky. At that time . . ."

He trailed off and looked at Franky, who had yet to sit up. "Oh, dear. Is he out of fuel again?"

"I'll be right back," Sabo said, standing and hurrying downstairs.

"We came upon Herr Franky like that," Brook continued as Luffy and Usopp looked at Franky's unmoving body curiously. "After we opened him up, Frau Robin realized he was steam-powered, and so we found a well and filled him back up."

Sabo returned with a bucket of water, pushed Franky up, and pressed something on the back of his neck. A small door in his shoulder opened up and Sabo carefully poured the water in.

"I've heated it up already, so it won't take long for him to get going," he said, setting down the bucket. Sure enough, a minute later, gears whirred and Franky opened his eyes.

"G'morning," he said. He moved his joints around, checking that they didn't need to be oiled. "Hey, isn't it a bit late?"

"You ran out of fuel again, Franky," Chopper said scoldingly. "I keep telling you to check it before you power down!"

"Oh," Franky said dumbly. He glanced around. "Uh . . . thanks, then."

"Don't ignore me!"

"I was just telling Prinz Luffy about how we met," Brook explained cheerfully.

"Yeah, that's a neat story," Franky exclaimed. He turned to Luffy. "There I was, out of fuel to the last drop, and suddenly my gears start turning again! Turns out Robin and Brook were smart enough to realize what a great machine I am and that I just needed some water to get going! Anyway, we all realized we needed places to stay, but it wasn't gonna be easy, especially with Königin Nami in power refusing to give poor folk like us places to live. And I think, 'Hey, I can build things, why not a house?'"

"You built this house?!" Luffy exclaimed. "That's amazing!"

Franky stood for the sake of striking a dramatic pose. "Isn't it?! I made ten beds just in case anyone needed a place to stay for a night, and it looks like they've all come in handy!"

Just then Robin called everyone down for breakfast.

* * *

"Well then, we're off," Sabo announced as the five pulled on their cloaks and whatnot. "Hey, Prinz Luffy, don't worry, we'll keep an eye out for that Zoro person."

Luffy grinned. "Thank you all so much! Oh, and I've been meaning to say . . . you don't have to use my title if you don't want to!"

They looked startled.

"Then . . . we'll see you later, Luffy," Ace said, grinning. The others nodded.

Luffy, Usopp, Vivi, and Chopper waved farewell as their friends trekked into the woods.

* * *

It was high noon as Zoro found himself in the woods once again with no food in his belly.

"Quiet, you," he muttered as his stomach grumbled. He sighed and continued hiking, hoping to find somewhere to stay, or at least some food. If only he could spot those folk he'd met yesterday, he could ask them for directions . . .

Or maybe, if he found Luffy . . .

Lost in his thoughts, he almost bumped into someone and stopped just in time. It was a wizened old woman, walking briskly and carrying a basket of apples, one of which was green.

"Watch where you're going, peasant," the woman snapped.

Zoro frowned. "Ma'am, I could say the same to you."

The woman stopped and got a closer look at him. Suddenly she scowled heavily. "Get out of my sight. I don't want to see your face."

"That's pretty rude of you, but I was going to leave anyway. Say, do you know which way the nearest village is?"

"I don't have time for you," the woman said haughtily. "Stay out of my way or you shall regret it."

Zoro watched her leave. He narrowed his eyes. It was odd, he reflected; she'd spoken and carried herself like a member of the royal family. And did she know him . . . ?

No, it couldn't be . . .

* * *

"Lunch will be ready soon," Vivi promised.

"Can I help?" Luffy offered. "I don't know how to cook, but . . ."

Vivi smiled and shook her head. "That's very kind, Pr—Luffy . . . but that's alright."

Luffy looked sadly at Sanji, sitting quietly on the couch and staring blankly ahead. "Sanji's a really good cook," he muttered angrily. "If he weren't like this, he could . . ."

Vivi looked at him sympathetically. "Maybe one day he'll have his senses returned," she said hopefully.

"I hope so," Luffy said.

Vivi retreated into the kitchen with Chopper.

There was a knock on the door.

"Oh, I'll answer it!" Luffy exclaimed, secretly hoping it would be Zoro. Usopp cautiously followed him and Luffy opened the door to find an old woman on the threshold.

"Hello," he said politely. "Can I help you?"

The woman smiled, showing off crooked teeth. "Greetings," she said in a croaky voice. "I picked my apple trees this year, but I have far too many than I know what to do with. Won't you take one or two?"

Luffy frowned. "Well . . ."

"You don't have to pay a thing," the woman pressed, "and you may try one before you take any, if you wish."

Luffy brightened. "Sounds good!"

The woman offered up the basket. Luffy scanned the apples and his eyes rested upon the green one.

"Green . . ." he murmured. He grinned to himself and selected it.

"Luffy, are you sure that this is wise?" Usopp whispered frantically. "There's something fishy here, I can see it in her eyes . . ."

"Hey, don't be rude," Luffy scolded. He took a big bite out of the apple, nearly half the whole thing, and promptly swallowed.

The old woman grinned wickedly. Luffy looked at her oddly before his eyes widened. He gasped and clutched at his throat—he tried to take a breath, but found he could not—as the seconds went on, his chest began to feel like it was on fire, and his hands clenched over it before going limp—

His eyes rolled up in his head and he collapsed to the ground, the half-eaten apple rolling out of his hand.

Usopp gasped and knelt beside him. He shook him, but Luffy's head only lolled to the side limply. He did not move.

The old woman cackled and Usopp looked up at her. His eyes widened in terror as her face and body melted and changed before him. As Vivi and Chopper hurried to the entryway, alerted by the odd sounds, they gasped.

Queen Nami stood over Luffy's unmoving body, cackling in delight.

"Ah, at last," she said in her own voice. She looked at Vivi and Chopper, who trembled in fear. "I don't know who you two are, but fear not; you shall not be punished for sheltering him."

She looked down at Usopp, who was, at this point, ready to wet his pants in fear. She grabbed him by the shirt and held him up.

"And I won't punish _you_ for running away," she said sweetly. "But only if you tell me something I need to know."

Usopp's eyes, if possible, widened even more. He quaked in his boots as the queen held his shirt tightly.

"Does Prinz Luffy love anyone?"

"He—"

Usopp clapped a hand over his own mouth, muffling the rest of his rhyme. Nami scowled and yanked his hand down.

"Does Prinz Luffy love anyone?" she repeated.

"He is in love, meine Königin," Usopp said, the words spilling out. "He's said it before, time and again."

He leaned away from her as if that would help his predicament.

"Leave . . . leave him alone!" Vivi exclaimed, by far the bravest act from her yet. But Nami glared at her and splayed her palm outwards; Vivi and Chopper were forced back into the living room by some invisible barrier.

"Who does Prinz Luffy love?" she demanded, glaring at Usopp. This time, with his arms held down, he could not help but answer.

"Prinz Luffy . . . loves . . . the peasant Zoro," Usopp choked out. "I'm told . . . with maps . . . he is not thorough . . ."

"Zoro . . ." Nami muttered. "What does he look like?"

Usopp struggled with himself for a moment. "His hair . . . is green . . . like grass or mold. I'm told . . . his looks . . . are a sight to behold."

"Green hair—but that's—!" Nami exclaimed. She dropped Usopp. "In love with _that_ man?! How . . ." she shook her head. "No matter . . . either way . . ."

She smiled at Usopp. "You've been very helpful, Usopp," she said in some mockery of politeness. She glanced at Vivi and Chopper, but frowned when she spotted a head of blond hair in the room behind them.

"That's . . ." she muttered. She sighed. "I suppose it doesn't matter." She smiled at Vivi and Chopper. With another splayed hand, she lowered the barrier. "You two may keep the rest of the apples. Don't worry, those ones are fine!"

Laughing, she turned and swept out of the cottage.

"Herr Usopp, Herr Luffy?!" Vivi cried, hurrying forward and kneeling by them.

"I can't . . . apologize enough," Usopp said, beginning to cry. "If on my language, this curse weren't so tough . . ."

"It's okay," Vivi said, embracing him suddenly. "It's okay. You couldn't help it."

She looked back at Chopper and Luffy. "Is he . . . ?"

Chopper looked up with wet eyes. "His heart . . . it's stopped!"

Vivi looked at the apple. "So it was poisoned," she murmured. She kicked it away.

"She killed him," Chopper whispered. He started to cry. "She . . . really . . . !"

Vivi buried her head in Usopp's shoulder, but Usopp stood, leaving her kneeling on the ground.

"Herr Usopp?" Vivi said shakily.

"I'm going to take revenge for him," Usopp announced. There was fire in his eyes. "I promise you, this is not on a whim."

"Revenge—?" Chopper gulped.

Usopp nodded. "She asked about the peasant," he explained. "I don't know why, but it's likely unpleasant. If she plans to murder him as well, I'm going to stop her before his death knell."

"But—she's so powerful," Vivi exclaimed.

"Frau Vivi, Herr Chopper, if I may, can one assist?" Usopp asked. "Please, go find our friends in the village midst."

"And explain what's happened," Vivi completed. She stood. "Right. I'll go, Herr Usopp."

"What about me?!" Chopper exclaimed.

Vivi looked at him and knelt. "Chopper, will you move the bod—Herr Luffy to a better place?" she asked softly. "And you'll need to keep an eye on Herr Sanji as well. You can handle that, can't you?"

Chopper gulped and nodded. "Yes, I can!" he declared.

Vivi smiled and straightened. "Thank you," she murmured. As Chopper managed to lift Luffy's limp body off of the ground, she turned to Usopp. "Let's go."

Usopp nodded and they hurried outside.


	9. Ding-Dong

Vivi and Usopp entered the woods and paused, looking around.

"I'll fly to the town and alert everyone," Vivi said.

Usopp nodded. "I'll try to prevent Herr Zoro's death. I hope I'll find him before his last breath."

Vivi nodded and leapt into the air. Her wings extended, flapped, and made a faint humming sound as they carried her into the air. Usopp watched in amazement as she shot above the trees, far faster than anyone could run.

Knowing there was no time to waste, he refocused on the task at hand and hurried into the trees, keeping his eyes peeled for a head of green hair.

* * *

Vivi touched down behind a shop, careful not to let anyone spot her. With her airborne agility, she had managed to reach her destination in half the time it would have taken to walk.

She sighed and let her wings droop before carefully tucking them into her shirt. Now she stepped into the street and, looking around, hurried to the nearby toy shop.

"Welcome," Ace said at the counter, barely looking up. "Feel free to browse the shelves."

"Herr Ace," Vivi said urgently.

Ace looked up and blinked in surprise. "Vivi! Is something wrong? What's happened?"

"There's no time to waste," Vivi exclaimed. "Will you get Herren Franky and Sabo? And we'll need to get Frau Robin and Herr Brook."

"Yeah, wait there," Ace said. He hurried into a back room and came out with the other two.

At their expectant faces, Vivi quickly explained the situation.

"He's . . . dead?" Ace said, stunned. "Luffy's . . ."

Vivi nodded, biting her lip to prevent tears. "And since Königin Nami seems to be after Herr Zoro . . . Herr Usopp went to protect him. We need to help him!"

"Damn, I wish I could cry," Franky muttered. "As it is, I almost feel like my heart isn't made of iron . . ."

"Are we sure he's dead?" Sabo asked. His fists were clenched by his sides.

Vivi hesitated. "His heart . . . stopped. And Königin Nami certainly seemed to think so . . ."

"But in any case, we need to rescue Herr Zoro," Ace finished. His hands were beginning to smolder. "Franky, Sabo, think we can close up shop for the day?"

"No problem," Franky agreed. While Ace, Sabo, and Vivi went outside, he went to the back room for a minute before locking up the doors and closing the shutters on the window.

"I'll grab Brook," he said. "Can you three get Robin?"

They nodded and Franky hurried off down the street.

"This way," Sabo said. Vivi noticed that his hands, too, were starting to glow with heat as they went.

They entered a cozy little bookshop with two floors, each with one small room. An old woman looked up from the counter as they entered.

"Ah, you're Robin's friends," she said with a smile. She glanced at Vivi. "And you are too, I presume?"

Vivi nodded.

"Frau Tsuru, I'm afraid something's come up," Ace said quickly. "Would you let Robin have the rest of the day off?"

"I'm sorry?" Robin said, coming downstairs with many books held in her arms, including one with a hairy orange beast on the cover.

"Hi," Sabo said. "Something big's come up and we need everyone. Think you can come with us?"

Robin examined their faces with narrowed eyes. "Yes," she said at last. She turned to her boss. "Frau Tsuru?"

"Your pay will be halved this week," Tsuru said abruptly.

Robin nodded and smiled. "Thank you," she said gratefully. She hurried upstairs and came back without the books. Throwing on her cloak to cover her arms, she left with the others.

They met up with Franky and Brook outside, where Vivi explained the situation again. For a moment there was only stunned silence.

"If only these eyes could shed tears," Brook said at last. "But I have no eyes . . ."

"I know how you feel," Franky agreed, clenching his fists.

"Let's hurry," Robin said quickly. "If Königin Nami runs into Herr Usopp, he may not be able to . . ."

The five hurried to the woods. Once the town was out of sight, Robin tied her cloak around her waist, Brook stowed away his gloves and mask, and the ones with wings extended them.

"We'll fly above and see if we can hear anything," Ace said.

"I'll check around the forest on ground level," Robin said, sprouting an eye on her palm to show what she meant.

"Brook, you're coming with us," Sabo added as he, Ace, and Vivi bent their knees.

"What?" Brook exclaimed, but before he could protest, Sabo grabbed him and jumped into the air with the others. Brook shrieked and was ignored.

Unlike Vivi's wings' insect-like buzzing, Ace's and Sabo's wings acted more like bats, gliding through the air with occasional flapping for lift. Brook held on tightly to Sabo's arm; since he was very light, it was not a chore to carry him.

Robin and Franky took off into the woods, looking around for Usopp, or Nami, or Zoro.

* * *

"Okay," Chopper sighed. He'd managed to get Luffy up the stairs as carefully as possible and had lain him on a bed. It hadn't been easy.

He looked at Luffy's prone figure.

"He . . . almost looks like . . . he's sleeping," he whispered.

Chopper got up on the bed next to him and pressed his ear to his chest. Sure enough, his heart was still.

He climbed down and gulped back tears before hurrying downstairs. He needed to keep an eye on Sanji, after all.

He found Sanji still sitting on the sofa, staring blankly ahead. He got up and sat next to him. Sanji looked vaguely down and to the left, sensing someone there.

"Luffy's . . . dead," he murmured. He touched Sanji's hand and Sanji carefully felt the hoof, frowning.

"Luffy's dead . . . and you don't even know," he continued. "Maybe if I were a better doctor . . . I could help you see and hear again . . ." he started to cry. "Or have stopped . . . the poison . . . from reaching his heart . . ."

He hugged Sanji around the middle, still crying. Sanji stiffened, but then awkwardly hugged him back, though he didn't know who he was hugging or why they were hugging him.

* * *

"Damn it all to hell," Zoro swore, climbing out of a brambleberry bush. "If I weren't so hungry, wouldn't have walked straight into that . . ."

He plucked some thorns out and eyed the dark berries on the vines.

"Then again, maybe it was a blessing in disguise," he muttered. He picked a handful and shoved them into his mouth. It did little to satiate his appetite, but at least the taste was decent, if not a bit overripe.

He sighed. "I hope Luffy's okay . . ."

As he turned, he caught sight of someone. He paused and squinted into the trees.

Orange hair, commoner's clothes, likely a woman . . .

What was _she_ doing all the way out here? Why was she dressed like that?

Zoro decided to avoid her and moved away. But as he stepped back, his foot hit a twig.

Nami's head snapped around with the _crack_ of the wood. She narrowed her eyes and approached him.

"Uh . . . Königin Nami," he said politely, sensing a dangerous aura from her. "Might I ask what you're doing here . . . ?"

"Hold still, Herr Zoro," she said sweetly. She reached under her shirt and drew out a dagger.

"What?!" Zoro exclaimed. She swung the knife at him, her smile so similar to the blade, and he dodged with agility borne from years of stealing food and running.

"Meine K—oh, forget the formalities!" he exclaimed, dodging another swing. "What the hell are you doing?!"

"If you're not dead," she hissed, clenching the dagger, "my plan may go to shambles! Now hold _still!"_

This time she flicked her hand at him. He was suddenly rooted to the spot, unable to even turn his head as she raised the knife—

Something like a warrior cry made her turn her head just as a figure plowed into her, knocking the knife out of her hands and freeing Zoro from his paralysis. He blinked and looked down.

A man in a jester's outfit had pinned Nami to the ground.

"Usopp, get off me!" she spat. "I command you!"

"I will not, meine Königin, I quit your service long ago!" Usopp exclaimed. "Now leave Herr Zoro alone and depart! Go!"

Nami snarled something indistinguishable and suddenly seized Usopp's arms. He screamed and fell off of her, clutching the places she'd grabbed while she sat up and seized the knife again.

"I found them!" someone yelled from somewhere. A woman with six arms and a man with stitches all over his body appeared from the trees. A moment later, a skeleton in a suit came crashing down through the trees, landing facedown on the forest floor and followed closely by two red-skinned young men with leathery wings and a girl with fragile-looking wings. These three floated down gently and brushed themselves off.

"Thank goodness you're alright, Herr Zoro," Vivi exclaimed, folding her wings along with Ace and Sabo.

"You didn't have to drop me," Brook told Sabo indignantly as he stood, brushing tree residue off of himself. "Why, if I had muscle still—"

"But you don't, and your bones aren't broken, so it's fine," Sabo completed dismissively.

Zoro looked around at the odd troupe. "What the hell is going on?" he demanded.

"We'll explain later," Franky said. "In the meantime, get out of here, would you?"

"I don't know who you all are," Nami said coldly, "but do you think I'd just let my prey go after I've come so far?"

She turned and threw the dagger at Zoro's midriff. He spun out of the way, barely dodging in time.

"What did I _do_?" he exclaimed.

"We're not sure either," Robin admitted. She ran forward and grabbed Nami from behind with her many arms, preventing her from getting the dagger back. "It seems to have something to do with our Prinz."

Zoro stared at her. "What? Lu—Prinz Luffy? You know where he is? Is he okay?"

"Well, about that—"

Before Robin could finish, she cried out as Nami seized her torso and sent electricity coursing through her veins. She released Nami and fell to her knees, breathing hard.

"Give me a minute," Franky said, holding up his arms. "This is going to use the rest of my fuel, got it? Vivi, can you distract her?"

Vivi nodded, her jaw set, and as Nami straightened up from grabbing the dagger, she ran forward and produced a ball of sun-like light, directing it into Nami's eyes. Nami cried out and shut her eyes, stumbling backwards, and she dropped the knife again. While she was blinded, Usopp snuck behind her, grabbed the dagger, and backed off again.

"Ace," Sabo said, and Ace understood immediately. As Vivi stepped back, they ran for Nami, stood on either side of her, and formed a ring of fire by stretching out their arms and producing flames, thereby trapping her.

As Nami recovered her sight, Franky stepped forward.

"I'm ready," he announced. "Drop the fire when I say. Three . . . two . . . NOW!"

Ace and Sabo ceased the flames, and just as Nami was able to see again, a huge cannon-like shot of water propelled her into a tree, soaking her from head to toe. Struggling, she lifted her arms and created a barrier, repelling the rest of the water.

As the blast ceased, Franky's arms fell to his side and he toppled onto his back, unmoving.

"No worries, everyone, I'll direct this only to her," Brook said, raising his violin. As Nami lowered the barrier and stumbled away from the tree, he drew the bow across the strings, producing a minor-key warbling melody. Nami glared at him at first, but then her expression changed; her eyebrows drew together, her bottom lip trembled, and she started to cry as she fell to her knees in despair.

"Herr Usopp," Robin murmured, looking up. Usopp held the knife in one trembling hand and approached Nami. In one swift motion he drove it into her side, just below her armpit.

Brook abruptly ceased the music as Nami gasped. Everyone went quiet as she weakly grasped at the hilt, the sadness brought upon by the music fading. But her hands slipped and red began to spread from the wound across her shirt.

Usopp's eyes were wide as he took a step back. But as Nami looked at him pleadingly, his jaw tightened, remembering what she had done to Luffy.

"And so . . . the jester vanquishes the evil witch," he said. Nami's eyes began to glaze over.

"Now it's time to say goodnight, you bitch."

She fell facedown to the forest floor and was still. Usopp's legs gave out and he, too, sank to the ground.

"She's . . . dead?" Vivi whispered.

"Seems that way," Ace murmured. Sabo and Brook went to help Robin up.

"I'm fine," she insisted. She looked at Nami's unmoving figure.

Zoro, who had been watching the whole thing with wide eyes, cleared his throat and everyone looked at him.

"Thanks for . . . saving me," he said uncertainly. "Now could someone please explain what the hell is going on?"

"Good question," Ace said. He hoisted Franky up and draped him over his shoulders. "I don't think anyone knows why she was after your life, Herr Zoro. Anyone?"

The others shrugged.

"Will you come with us to our home?" Brook asked politely.

"Oh, that's right—you said something about Lu—Prinz Luffy," Zoro said. He looked around. "Do you know where he is? Is he okay? What's happened?"

He glanced down and helped Usopp up.

"Well?"

The others were quiet.

"How do we tell him?" Sabo muttered to Ace.

"Let's be on our way first," Ace suggested, shifting Franky on his back. "We can all explain then."

Zoro hesitantly nodded. The eight set on their way, but paused and looked back at Nami's prone figure.

"Well, we assassinated the Königin," Ace said abruptly. "Should we hide the body, or . . . ?"

"I'm not sure she deserves a proper burial," Sabo said darkly, "but we can come back and bring the body to the castle later. In the meantime, let's go back and check on the others."

They walked on. Eventually Nami was out of sight.

"So, would you mind explaining?" Zoro asked, his patience running out. "What's going on with Prinz Luffy?"

"Königin Nami was out to kill him," Usopp said. His hands were still shaking. "He and I fled and found everyone. They were kind enough to let us stay."

The others looked at him strangely, but Zoro only gave him a quizzical look. "Out to kill him?"

Usopp nodded. "She's . . . very vain, and found out that Luffy is cuter than her. So she set out to have him killed. Sanji was sent to kill us, but failed . . ."

"That blond servant," Zoro remembered. He glanced around. "Come to think of it, you guys are the ones I met yesterday, aren't you?"

"Yes," Robin said, still looking at Usopp curiously. "Herr Sanji is doing well. And you must have been looking for Prinz Luffy?"

Zoro nodded.

Usopp cleared his throat. "In any case—"

"Uh, before you go on," Ace said, "Herr Usopp, you're . . . not rhyming."

Usopp's eyes widened. "You're right!" he exclaimed. "But this means . . ." he looked around. "The grass is blue, the sky is green, and my name is Pinocchio!"

He laughed out loud. "I'm not rhyming! And I can lie again!"

Zoro looked at him strangely while the others smiled supportively. Usopp quickly explained his previous predicament.

"But then that means . . . she really is dead," Usopp said, his smile fading. "Then again, after what she did . . ."

"Frankly, I'm not too upset about it," Zoro said, shrugging. "After all . . . this means that Luffy will become König, doesn't it?"

The others looked away.

"What aren't you telling me?!"

Usopp cleared his throat loudly. "Er . . . Herr Zoro, if I may finish . . ."

Zoro nodded. Usopp recounted what had happened earlier that day. As he spoke, it looked harder and harder for him to get each word out, and by the time he was finished, Zoro was staring at him in shocked silence.

"That . . . can't be true," he said, shaking his head slowly as his footsteps stilled. "He can't be dead . . . surely you're joking . . ."

He looked around at the others and saw they were biting back tears or deliberately turned away.

"I don't believe it," he said abruptly, starting to walk at a brisker pace. "I won't believe it until I see him with my own eyes. He's at your cottage?"

"Yes," Vivi murmured. "Chopper and Herr Sanji as well."

Zoro looked around. "I almost forgot . . . what _are_ you all?"

They glanced around.

"We'll keep this brief," Sabo said.

* * *

All over the land, those who had been affected by Nami's magic were reverted to their original states. There was joy and chaos and confusion everywhere.

But those who had perished at her hand could not rise again . . .

* * *

Sanji blinked hard and fast as if he was just waking up. He looked around confusedly, spotted Chopper sitting next to him, and screamed. Chopper looked up and screamed in turn. They kept up this harmonious racket for a good minute or so.

When they finally calmed down, Sanji looked around again. "I . . . I can see again," he said breathlessly. "And my hearing's back, and my voice . . . ! Finally . . ."

"You're all better?" Chopper squeaked.

Sanji looked at him. "You're . . . were you taking care of me?" he asked tentatively. At Chopper's nod, he briefly bowed. "Thank you very much."

"I wasn't the only one, but . . . the others should be returning soon," Chopper said quietly.

"Oh—" Sanji exclaimed. "Usopp was here, wasn't he? And . . . Prinz Luffy?"

Chopper gulped. "Well . . . that is . . . Königin Nami, she . . ."

"Meine Königin, she was here?" Sanji demanded. "Wait, start over, please. How did I get here? Where are Usopp and Luffy?"

Chopper slowly recounted what had happened since Luffy and Usopp had come to them and Sanji had been brought to the cottage. He choked back tears when telling of what had happened with Luffy and Nami, and explained where the others were.

Sanji stared at him with wide eyes.

"He's . . . dead . . . ?" he whispered. "Mein Prinz is . . . ?"

"I'm sorry, we couldn't protect him," Chopper said, beginning to cry. "And now he's—"

"It's . . . it's okay," Sanji said slowly. "I'm sure it wasn't your fault. But . . . you said it was poison . . . ?"

"A poisoned apple," Chopper said, sniffling.

"Is it still here? May I see it?"

Chopper brought him to the door, where the half-eaten apple still lay. Sanji picked it up by the stem and examined it.

"Green . . ." he murmured. "Why did meine Königin want to go after that peasant again . . . ?"

"I don't know," Chopper said quietly. "She asked Usopp if Luffy loved anyone, and Usopp was forced to tell her about Herr Zoro. Luffy talked about him so much . . ."

"He's in love with _him_ —?" Sanji shook his head. "Well, never mind . . . so she was after whoever Luffy loved . . ." He frowned. "Love . . . _true_ love . . . true love's ki—?"

He gasped.

"I think . . . we can still save him."


	10. True Love's Kiss?

**(I lied, one more chapter after _this_ one.)**

* * *

Ace and Sabo held their hands in the bucket of water until small bubbles began to form. They withdrew their hands; Ace picked up the bucket and poured the hot water into Franky's open hatch. A minute later, Franky whirred to life, sitting up and looking around.

"What happened?' he asked.

Robin quickly explained.

"Wow," Franky said. He stood. "So . . . now _both_ members of the royal family are . . ."

"If I could find that necromancer again . . ." Brook mused aloud.

"No, Brook," Sabo scolded. He sighed and turned to Vivi. "Hey, is it possible Chopper was mistaken?"

"I'm not sure," Vivi admitted. "But either way, we should see him for ourselves. If he truly is dead . . . he deserves a proper burial, doesn't he?"

"Not to sound impatient, but can we go inside already?"

Everyone looked at Zoro, who was standing near the door, clearly agitated.

"Of course," Usopp said, looking around. Everyone went inside and, after removing their shoes, slowly went upstairs.

". . . correct, then to bring him back—"

They found Luffy still lying prone on the bed. Chopper and Sanji were kneeling on either side of him, and Sanji cut himself off in the middle of saying something to look up. He gave an exclamation of surprise and stood suddenly.

"You're back!" Chopper exclaimed happily. He looked at Zoro. "And you're Herr Zoro, right?"

Zoro nodded, but his eyes were on Luffy. Everyone came farther in, spreading out around the bed.

Sanji looked around, taking in their strange appearances. "If I'm correct, you . . ." he bowed. "Thank you for taking care of me."

"You've recovered?" Vivi exclaimed.

"You, too!" Usopp said, smiling. "Thank goodness!"

"Usopp," Sanji said, ashamed, "I'm so sorry for what I did . . ."

"It's okay," Usopp said quickly. "I'm sure Luffy would forgive you, after all . . ."

He looked at Luffy and his smile faded.

"Then he really has passed," Ace said, just above a whisper.

Zoro had not moved since seeing Luffy lying still on the bed. His eyes were fixed upon him.

Sanji cleared his throat. "I was just saying to Herr Chopper . . . I think we can bring him back."

At this Zoro finally looked up. "Oh, it's you," he said, apparently noticing Sanji for the first time. "You've come back to your senses?"

Sanji scowled. "Where were you all that time? Listen, I think we can bring Prinz Luffy back."

"Are you a necromancer?" Brook asked curiously.

Sanji eyed him up and down. "No," he said. He looked around at everyone again. "What are—? Well, we'll save that for later."

"We can bring him back?" Robin prompted. Everyone looked at Sanji hopefully.

Sanji nodded. "According to Chopper . . . he stopped breathing when he took a bite of that apple, correct? The apple was green, and afterwards, Königin Nami set out to kill you." He looked at Zoro, and then glanced around. "Come to think of it . . . where _is_ meine Königin?" he frowned. "If the spells were lifted . . ."

Usopp coughed. "Long story . . . in the meantime, go on."

Sanji frowned with worry, but quickly recovered. "In any case, I've seen this poison in one of meine Königin's spellbooks. It's a powerful poison, and there is only one antidote."

"Which is?" Ace prompted.

"True love's kiss."

Silence engulfed the room. Everyone slowly turned to look at Zoro.

"Why are you looking at me?" he demanded, eyeing Luffy. "Shouldn't . . . we be trying to learn who Prinz Luffy loves?"

The others exchanged exasperated glances.

"It might not work if it's not reciprocated," Sanji remarked. "Herr Pennbruder, sorry to be blunt, but do you love Prinz Luffy?"

Zoro opened his mouth, but nothing came out.

"I think that's a yes," Franky said.

"I—what—"

"Answer the question," Sabo said sternly.

Zoro swallowed nervously. "Of course I love him," he murmured. "But he doesn't love me back. How could he? I'm just a homeless peasant, I'm not good enough for someone like _him_ . . ."

There was another round of exasperated glances.

"You're an idiot," Franky said at last. "How do you think we knew your name?"

Zoro frowned. Evidently he hadn't considered this.

Usopp sighed. "Do you know how much he's _talked_ about you?"

"He talked about me?" Zoro repeated, stunned.

"Look," Ace said, running out of patience. "Give it a try, won't you? If this doesn't work . . ." he trailed off. A few of his fingers began smoking.

Zoro looked at Luffy nervously. He swallowed and knelt by the bed (Chopper and Vivi clearing the way for him).

Luffy looked so peaceful, though he was without breath or movement. With one final look around at everyone, Zoro pursed his lips and lowered his face—

"Wait!"

He jerked back and everyone stared at Robin indignantly.

"What?"

"Herr Zoro, move aside, if you will," she ordered. He stepped back, very confused, and she approached the bed. She balled all of her hands together on top of each other into three fists and promptly slammed them with great force into Luffy's chest.

The portion of apple Luffy had swallowed, too big for his throat, came flying out from its previously stuck position and sailed across the room, hitting the ceiling and bouncing to the floor. Luffy gasped, opened his eyes, and sat up suddenly.

"Wow, I thought I was going to die!" he exclaimed, breathing in deeply and coughing. Once he recovered, he glanced around. "Hi, everyone! What's going on?"

"IT WAS STUCK IN YOUR THROAT?!" the others yelled, half-indignant and half-relieved.

"I only just noticed," Robin admitted.

Chopper began to cry. "Why didn't I notice . . . ?"

Vivi patted his head, choking back tears herself. "Herr Luffy, thank goodness you're alive . . ."

"I hope I didn't break any ribs," Robin remarked with a relieved smile.

Luffy felt his chest. "No, I'm fine."

"Do you need water?" Ace asked. "Sabo, come on, let's get some water for him—"

"Mein Prinz, thank goodness," Sanji said happily.

"Sanji!" Luffy exclaimed. "You're well again?"

Sanji nodded. "I must sincerely apologize for . . . my previous actions."

Luffy grinned. "You're forgiven! I apologize for punching you!"

"I can't believe it was just stuck in your throat," Usopp groaned.

Luffy looked at him in surprise. "You're not rhyming?"

Usopp grinned. "I'll explain later. I'm glad you're fine."

Brook cleared his throat as Franky pretended to wipe away tears. "Herr Luffy, if you would look to your left . . ."

Luffy glanced to his right.

"Your other left."

Luffy looked the other way and gasped, finally seeing Zoro.

"ZORO!"

As Ace and Sabo returned with water, he leapt up from the bed and jumped on Zoro in a hug.

"Zoro," he cried. "I'm so glad you're okay, I missed you so much!"

Zoro cleared his throat, choking back tears of his own, and managed to get Luffy off of him. "Mein Prinz," he said formally, conscious of the others, "I'm glad to see you well again."

"Don't be so stuffy!" Luffy exclaimed, hugging him again and laughing. "I told you to call me Luffy!"

"Don't you two have something to tell each other?" Robin asked with faint amusement.

"Of course!" Luffy exclaimed. He backed off and grinned. "Zoro, I love you!"

Zoro's hand flew to his mouth and his eyes widened. He seemed at a loss for words.

"I'm sorry, I wanted to tell you earlier," Luffy explained, "but then this whole mess happened with stepmother, and I couldn't meet with you . . ."

At Zoro's continued silence, he frowned. "Oh . . . I'm sorry, you . . . don't return my feelings, is that it?" he sighed. "That's okay. I just . . . wanted to tell you."

Before he could turn away, Zoro finally lowered his hand.

"No!" he exclaimed. "Luffy, I . . . I didn't think you'd ever love me back. I . . ." he smiled. "I love you, too."

Luffy's sunshine smile burst back onto his face. "Zoro!" he cried happily.

Zoro laughed in delight and, on some impulse, picked Luffy up and spun him around.

"I'm going to be sick," Sanji muttered, though he too was smiling.

Zoro finally put Luffy down and pulled him into a crushing hug. The others applauded; Usopp cheerfully offered a dance to Sanji, who respectfully declined.

"Move one muscle, and I'll blast you into the wall."

The party froze and turned to the stairs.

Nami stood there, her appearance disheveled. The bloodstain was still visible on her shirt, but the wound seemed to have healed. She clenched the bloody dagger in her hands, aiming it threateningly at those gathered.

"I will _not_ ," she hissed, "let this plan fail. Give me Prinz Luffy and I shan't harm anyone else."

"Meine Königin," Sanji exclaimed, relieved to see her. "You're alright, thank goodness—"

Usopp's legs shook so much they were heard knocking together. "How?" he stuttered. "I _killed_ you—"

"And _you'll_ get your punishment soon enough," Nami said sweetly. "But first, Luffy. Hand him over."

Vivi frowned. She slowly approached Nami, who turned the dagger to her.

"Herr Usopp," Vivi said, standing in front of Nami, who made no move to harm her. "You said the spells upon you would break by three ways."

"Move, faery, or I'll be forced to move you myself," Nami said shakily.

Usopp frowned. "I . . . the spells would break if . . . if she removed them herself, if she died, or . . . if she lost her magic."

Nami flinched.

"What's going on?" Luffy exclaimed.

"Usopp, you said you killed her?" Sanji asked dangerously.

Usopp gulped. "It's a long story . . ."

Vivi suddenly seized the knife and threw it away. She spread her arms and stood in front of Nami.

"Do your worst," she challenged.

Nami stood frozen in front of her. Vivi made a sudden motion and Nami flinched again.

"Then . . ." Usopp said slowly. "In order to heal the wound, you . . ."

Nami was clearly scared now. "So what if I lost my magic?" she exclaimed suddenly. "It took all I had to save myself from dying . . . but with or without my powers, I'm still the ruler of this land!"

"Zoro," Luffy said, turning to Zoro abruptly. "Marry me."

"Okay," Zoro agreed with a dazed smile.

Luffy turned back to Nami. "You're not the ruler anymore," he declared. "Zoro and I are married now. We'll hold the proper ceremonies later, but as of now I'm officially the König. What say you?"

"What—you can't marry a _peasant_!" Nami exclaimed indignantly.

"There isn't anything in the law that says I can't," Luffy pointed out. "Oh, before I forget . . ."

He approached her and delivered a swift uppercut to her chin. She tasted blood and covered her mouth, wincing.

"How _dare_ you," she hissed.

Luffy folded his arms. "That was for what you did," he said sternly.

Nami flinched from him and lowered her hands.

"Looks aren't everything, you know," Luffy said. "But if you changed your attitude, you'd be that much more beautiful, you know?"

She stared at him indignantly, but before she could retort, he clapped his hands.

"I think we should return to the castle," he said cheerfully. He looked around. "If you want to, you may all come live with us."

The part-humans shook their heads.

"We already have a roof over our heads," Franky said. "But you're very kind, thank you."

Luffy turned to Sanji and Usopp. "Usopp, would you return to your old job? Either way, you're coming back to the castle. And Sanji, you're coming as well, aren't you?"

Usopp agreed with a smile, but Sanji frowned and looked at Nami.

"Oh, you're coming, too," Luffy added, eyeing Nami.

Nami stared at him.

"You don't have anywhere else to go, and I need to keep an eye on you," Luffy explained. He grinned. "Just because you're not the Königin anymore . . . and besides, you need to get cleaned up with the rest of us."

She scowled heavily.

The twelve made their way down the stairs, keeping a close eye on Nami to make sure she didn't pull any tricks.

At the door, hugs and thank-yous were exchanged, as well as a few tears. And then it was finally time to go.

"I'll send someone to give you an invitation for the ceremonies!" Luffy exclaimed as they left, waving his arms vigorously. "Goodbye!"

"Meine Dame?" Sanji said, offering his arm. Nami eyed him and accepted warily. He smiled and was happy to lead her just behind Luffy and Zoro, Usopp bringing up the rear.

"I'm so glad you're okay," Zoro murmured, walking next to Luffy arm-in-arm.

Luffy grinned. "I'm glad _you're_ okay!"

"I'd gone to the castle, but . . ." Zoro said, stumbling over his words. "I couldn't find my way through the woods, and then . . ."

He glanced back at Nami, who scowled heavily. He turned back to the front.

"First thing's first," Luffy declared, clutching Zoro's arm, "you're going to have a bath when we return."

Zoro smiled. "That sounds good."

Luffy looked back at Nami. "And _you_ need to learn to treat people better."

"Excuse me?" Nami snapped.

Luffy frowned. "Sanji's so loyal and kind, but you took away his senses. Usopp's one of the greatest guys I know, but you cursed him for two years. You also tried to kill me," he added as an afterthought.

"I forgive you, meine Dame," Sanji said quickly. "I'm sure I deserved it."

"No, you didn't," Luffy said sternly. "Stepmother, if I catch you treating anyone badly when they don't deserve it, I'm going to take away your dinner for a week."

Nami stared at him, speechless with indignation. Luffy grinned and turned back to the front while Sanji whispered, "I'll still bring you food."

"I heard that," Luffy said cheerfully. "Speaking of food, Sanji, do you feel up to cooking?"

"Always, mein König," Sanji declared. "I'll whip up a grand feast when we return."

Luffy grinned. "Thank you!"

He leaned against Zoro as they walked. Zoro held him tightly with one arm as if afraid he might slip away, and they spent the rest of their walk back just like this . . . in loving silence.


	11. A Proper Marriage

**So. I originally was going to end it on the last chapter. I was satisfied with what I'd written, and that the loose ends were tied up by the final paragraph.**

 **But... apparently, some of you were not satisfied. So after months of internal struggle, I broke and decided to write one more chapter.  
**

 **I changed the ending to the last chapter a bit to fit this, so feel free to go back and look.**

 **Final chapter for sure this time! Here we go!**

* * *

"By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you wed! You may kiss!"

The priest closed the book and Luffy jumped on Zoro, knocking him to the ground as he kissed him long and hard, only pulling away when he ran out of air. The crowd on the lawn stood and applauded with vigor. Luffy and Zoro were comfortable with a small audience, and so the invitees were the former Queen Nami, Sanji, Usopp, and the ones from the forest cottage. The news would be spread through the kingdom soon enough.

Usopp and Sanji had insisted that Luffy and Zoro keep physical contact to a minimum before the ceremony, and as Sanji unveiled the feast on the tables, Luffy took full advantage of his newfound freedom by making Zoro get up and clinging to his back.

"Uh . . . mein König, are you planning on getting down soon?" Usopp said, eyeing this strange arrangement.

"No," Luffy said, resting his head on Zoro's shoulder. Zoro shifted to keep him steady. "And honestly, it's Luffy! It's always been Luffy, and this doesn't change that!"

Usopp grinned. "If you insist."

"These clothes feel so strange," Zoro said, turning his head to glance at Luffy out of the corner of his eye. "I can't believe you wear these every day."

"They're okay once you get used to them," Luffy said, grinning.

The others swarmed around them to congratulate their marriage, and only Nami hung back, eyeing the couple disdainfully. She'd been under house arrest for the past week on Luffy's orders and, despite that her arrogance had softened some without magic to back her up, her attitude remained generally the same.

"How will you two dance like that?" Robin asked curiously, clasping her arms behind her back.

"Eh, we'll dance later," Zoro said with the smallest of shrugs (not wanting to disrupt Luffy's position). In truth, he was rather shy about his dancing skills, or lack thereof.

"Hugs are just as important," Luffy added with finality.

"Frau Robin, may I have this dance?" Franky asked, coming up next to her and offering a hand. Brook, standing near the tables, began playing his violin in a cheerful tune. Robin smiled and accepted Franky's hand with one of her own, and they spun away with lively movements.

"Meine Dame, shall we dance?" Sanji asked hopefully, extending his hand to Nami. Her mood must have been influenced by the music, for she accepted after a moment. Sanji's eyes lit up and he let her lead in a bright polka.

"Hey, Vivi!" Usopp called, waving to her, but she was already dancing with Chopper. Usopp sighed and hung his head.

"There, there," Luffy said, stretching out a hand to pat his head.

"Luffy, what're you doing up there?" Sabo yelled from where he and Ace were.

"I'm spending quality time with my husband!" Luffy yelled back. "What're _you_ doing? Aren't you going to dance, too?"

"We were going to ask _you_ to dance after you'd finished with König Zoro!" Ace yelled.

"I'll never get used to that title," Zoro muttered.

"You'll have to," Luffy said sternly. "We're both Könige now. We'll just deal with the political stuff later."

"I don't know anything about politics!"

"Stepmother will give us pointers," Luffy said confidently. He glanced over to where Nami was finishing her dance with Sanji. "Hey, stepmother! You'll give Zoro and me tips on ruling, won't you?"

Brook's song faded into a different but equally upbeat tune. Nami narrowed her eyes at Luffy and Zoro.

"She will," Luffy said.

"If you say so."

"Hey, go to the table . . ."

Zoro approached the table, keeping Luffy on his back. Luffy leaned over, grabbed some food, and pushed it into Zoro's mouth.

"Isn't it good?" he said happily.

Zoro coughed and swallowed. "Somewhat," he admitted grudgingly, glancing at Sanji with a scowl.

The rest of the reception proceeded in merriment and good nature. It seemed all too soon when the sun began to set and the others had to return home.

"You're free to visit any time," Luffy declared, hugging each of them in turn after finally climbing off of Zoro. "Let us know immediately if there's trouble."

"If . . . if you need a doctor, I can help!" Chopper blurted out.

"Or a mechanic," Franky added.

"Or a musician," Brook sang.

"Or firestarters," Ace and Sabo said together.

Robin patted Luffy's back with half her hands. "We'll be sure to visit soon," she promised.

Sanji and Usopp began cleaning up as Luffy and Zoro waved farewell. The forest-dwellers vanished into the woods.

"Oh, would you like help with that?" Luffy asked, glancing over to Sanji and Usopp.

"Not at all, mein König," Sanji said, gathering up platters and stacking them into Usopp's arms.

"This is no job for royalty," Usopp said, shooting a half-hearted glare at Sanji when he started to wince under so much weight.

Sanji looked over at Nami, who had hardly moved since their guests had departed, taking her time in surveying the Kings and the servants in silence.

"Meine Dame?" he said tentatively. "Is there something you need?"

Nami pursed her lips and stared at the ground a little ways away.

"None of you have been cruel."

"Pardon?" Sanji said, pausing in his task. Luffy, Zoro, and Usopp looked over as well.

"After what I did . . ." Nami said, "you . . . none of you have beaten me or said harsh words. If it were me . . . I would certainly hate myself. So, why . . . ?"

"I could never hate you, meine Dame," Sanji exclaimed. "I love you with all my heart!"

Usopp and Zoro looked at him in exasperation.

"I'm not saying I've forgiven you," Zoro said, turning back to Nami, "but if Luffy won't treat you badly, I won't, either."

"I'll second that," Usopp said, shifting his burden. "That is . . . you did curse me for—what, two years?—but I did stab you back then, so I'd say we're even."

Nami eyed him and Usopp looked down out of habit.

"I just feel sorry for you, really," Luffy said. Nami's head snapped to him and she looked ready to bark a retort, but he held up his hand.

"I feel as though having all that magic at your disposal corrupted you somewhat," he continued. "If not for all that power, none of this would have ever happened, I think." He grinned. "And, honestly? I've said it before, but . . . looks aren't everything. Even if you aren't the cutest in the land or whatever it was, you're loved. Who cares about beauty?"

"I don't really count Sanji."

"Oh," Luffy said, laughing as Sanji seemed to deflate where he stood. "But I love you, too, stepmother! Even if you tried to kill me."

Nami clenched her hands. "But I _hate_ you."

"I don't think you do."

A moment of tension . . .

Nami began walking slowly towards Luffy. Usopp shuffled his feet, ready to spring if necessary (and drop the plates in the process), and Zoro's arm went up in front of Luffy—

Nami moved right on past them.

"I shall retire to my room," she said, suddenly sounding very tired. She faced away from them.

"Meine Dame, I shall accompany you—" Sanji said hastily. He caught himself and looked at Luffy. "If mein König allows it?"

"Of course," Luffy said. He grinned. "Zoro's the König too, you know."

Sanji shrugged noncommittally and turned away from Zoro, shoving the rest of his plates in Usopp's arms and going to walk with Nami. "Meine Dame?"

She accepted his arm and they went into the castle.

"Usopp, seriously, let us help," Luffy said. He and Zoro came forward and took several of the dishes.

"Thanks," Usopp said with a resigned grin.

* * *

"Our own room at last!" Luffy exclaimed, throwing himself onto the floor rather than the bed and rolling around. He and Zoro had changed into nightclothes previously, and Zoro turned on the light by the bed to see better by.

"Zoro, we're married now, so it's okay!" Luffy said happily, rolling over to look at Zoro upside-down as Zoro sat on the edge of the bed.

"Yeah," Zoro said, unable to help but smile when he saw how delighted Luffy was.

"There's a lot of work to do in the kingdom," Luffy said, sitting up and jumping onto the bed, "but we'll take a private voyage sooner or later!"

"We will?"

"Of course!" Luffy crawled over to his side of the bed and paused, facing away.

"Zoro . . ."

Zoro waited.

"We . . . have the bed all to ourselves," Luffy said. "And there's no one else in the room." He looked behind him with a mischievous smile. "You do know what this means?"

Zoro froze. Of all things to bring up—

"I . . . no?" he said weakly.

"PILLOW FIGHT!"

"Wh—"

Zoro barely had time to speak before he was whomped in the face. He recovered and found Luffy kneeling and clutching his pillow, laughing.

"I challenge you, mein König!" Luffy declared.

"A royal bout of soft-handed combat, is it?" Zoro said, grabbing his own pillow and hitting Luffy in the side. "I accept, mein schatz!"

* * *

Usopp sat up sleepily in his bed, hearing commotion elsewhere in the castle.

"They're so noisy," he muttered. "I should've expected, it's their first night together, after all . . ."

He covered his head with his pillow.

* * *

Zoro fell down, exhausted, and Luffy curled up on top of him, his head resting on his chest. The bed, the floor, and the two of them were covered in feathers.

"One hell of a first night together," Zoro mumbled.

"That was fun," Luffy said sleepily. "I'm . . ." he yawned. " _Really_ glad stepmother didn't kill you."

" _I'm_ glad she didn't kill _you_ ," Zoro mumbled, tilting his head to kiss Luffy's forehead.

"Mm," Luffy mumbled. He wriggled upwards and kissed Zoro's cheek. "'M tired . . ."

"Yeah . . ."

Half-conscious, Zoro adjusted his arms so he loosely held Luffy, and Luffy, barely awake, snuggled into Zoro and stretched his arm up to meet his head.

"Love you," he mumbled right as he fell asleep.

"Love y' . . . too," Zoro whispered.

* * *

~Fin~

* * *

 **Story's done! Thank you for all your support, everyone!**


End file.
